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Responses to negative people

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I think everyone can relate to this:

You are talking to someone (on the phone or in real life) who just can´t help themselves but spread misery around. This can be either a marketing call or an annoying family member. They will use negative bait to draw you in and make you agree that indeed, you are quite the nuisance.

Now you can let them talk and stop listening, but often their negative attitudes find a way into your head anyway. So I want to suggest we take a bit of time and see if we can find responses to these people that will throw them off - while at the same time, staying away from their negativity.

For example:

- Did you just have surgery on your fun bone (I know, terrible)
- Are you enjoying the weather as well, I think I´ll go on a great walk
- I had an amazing lasagna yesterday!

Let´s see if we can make a change here and turn things around :D
 
I call these people mood hoovers (vacuums) because they tend to suck away the positivity and fun from a room in seconds! I just ignore it now and think to pick my battles, life is to short to be dragged into other people negativity so I will literally just walk away, let them find another victim to drag down :D
 
"Mood Hoovers", I like it. Ignoring them is the best way to go, but sometimes you can´t (if they work for a service provider, for example). In that case it´d be good to have a sentence to throw them off (perhaps even cheer up their day, so they stop sucking all the fun out of every conversation they have!)
 
These same people will automatically turn into victims, if stood up to, so be ready for it...I am outspoken about this kind of thing, so yes, sometimes my comments or actions are very rude.. I've worked too hard to let Energy Vampires steal from me... but THEY usually avoid ME afterward.... what ever it takes....

Who peed in your Wheaties this morning??

Slowly walk around them , looking them up and down, they will usually ask, what is it? I then say, just trying to see where all this is coming from.

Are you always like this??

Does happiness and joy offend you in some way?

I have a lot of them... will get back to this when I have more time...Great thread !!!
 
I struggle the most with folks who have a problem for every solution they ask for, maybe because I feel like I used to be like that, too. Like laddee mentioned, most of those folks don't fool with contacting me after an interaction, so it pretty much takes care of itself.

I tend to try to open up a dialogue with some by asking if they've had a crappy day, by sharing that I can only imagine the BS they deal with within a day (especially on the phone if it's a real human telemarketer or a taking care of business call), or by asking them to tell me more about how they feel about the topic of discussion, that is if I have the time to spare and the energy left to engage. I like to offer other viewpoints they haven't yet entertained, and there again, that often naturally drives them away with no desire to further engage.

I enjoy stories, even the not so pleasant ones, and I've come to realize that rather often, another's negativity is simply an outward projection of some really deep unprocessed pain, and I realize the benefits of having a willing ear ready to genuinely listen, so I try to be that ear when I can.

Otherwise, I do my best to kindly disengage in the moment of feeling their draining effects and move along, reserving what precious energies I have left for that day.
 
I left my ex husband because he was so negative. All the time. It was sucking the life out of me. Who'd a thought a PTSD relationship would be better than that negativity?

I avoid people like that. I have my own problems to worry about I don't need theirs.
 
Sometimes i work i pretend i have not heard them, only what they said, then i shower them with over the top positive responses till they feel silly and i get somewhere.
But this only works with certain people, others i match their hostility and raise them with what I know - that they are in the wrong and i will be advocating and not going away ever till they fufill their duties
 
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