So I'm not 100% sure what caused my guys PTSD but I believe it's from a serious of events that happened 5 years ago, including losing his career/fiancé/home all within a short period of time.
Things with us have been... Odd lately. Not much communication, no alone time. I've told him that I feel like I'm putting in all the effort, and that I'm going to stop asking to hang out because I feel like I'm putting pressure on him and it's adding to his stress.
He was ok with that, aside from thinking I meant I was going to leave him alone completely which I quickly explained wasn't the case, just that I felt for now that I should back off and let him make plans when he's ready.
Here's the issue. He's admitted that he's afraid to be me alone with me because he could fail. He hasn't explained because we haven't had much of a chance to talk. I don't know what to do here. How can I have a relationship with someone who avoids spending one on one time? There's been nothing physical in a month. And the only time he's spent with me lately was with family over holidays. He's afraid of another relationship failing, but he's guaranteeing failure if he can't even bring himself to make me a part of his life. He's said he's going to try, but I don't know how to help get things back how they were in the beginning.
Any help or thoughts?
Things with us have been... Odd lately. Not much communication, no alone time. I've told him that I feel like I'm putting in all the effort, and that I'm going to stop asking to hang out because I feel like I'm putting pressure on him and it's adding to his stress.
He was ok with that, aside from thinking I meant I was going to leave him alone completely which I quickly explained wasn't the case, just that I felt for now that I should back off and let him make plans when he's ready.
Here's the issue. He's admitted that he's afraid to be me alone with me because he could fail. He hasn't explained because we haven't had much of a chance to talk. I don't know what to do here. How can I have a relationship with someone who avoids spending one on one time? There's been nothing physical in a month. And the only time he's spent with me lately was with family over holidays. He's afraid of another relationship failing, but he's guaranteeing failure if he can't even bring himself to make me a part of his life. He's said he's going to try, but I don't know how to help get things back how they were in the beginning.
Any help or thoughts?