(Shortest intro I could do for a very involved story)...Prior to 7 years ago, my life was laced w/fear and ongoing depression, but other than that, mostly a normal life (as normal as life ever is).
Since then, I've had flashbacks relating to being molested around 3 yrs old and being exposed to satanic ritual abuse; flashbacks from a rape at 19 that I repressed... In addition dissociation /fragmentation/separate thoughts.
Worst of all, are tormenting sensations I have felt constantly for the last 7 yrs. They mimic the sexual abuse, but because they never go away, (unless I'm asleep or ultra focused on something), I assume they may not be body memories.
Looking for someone who understands. I'm so tired of these sensations and the torment of - is it true, or isn't it (flashbacks & video tapes in my mind's eye). I have a strong aversion to being deceived and just want to move on.
Thanks for allowing me to introduce me and my situation.
~BB
Since then, I've had flashbacks relating to being molested around 3 yrs old and being exposed to satanic ritual abuse; flashbacks from a rape at 19 that I repressed... In addition dissociation /fragmentation/separate thoughts.
Worst of all, are tormenting sensations I have felt constantly for the last 7 yrs. They mimic the sexual abuse, but because they never go away, (unless I'm asleep or ultra focused on something), I assume they may not be body memories.
Looking for someone who understands. I'm so tired of these sensations and the torment of - is it true, or isn't it (flashbacks & video tapes in my mind's eye). I have a strong aversion to being deceived and just want to move on.
Thanks for allowing me to introduce me and my situation.
~BB