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Sitting Position In Therapy

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ellienad

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A lot of the triggers surrounding my trauma have to do with certain positioning (sitting position, lying position, etc.) and my T knows a majority of this.

That said, every session I get stuck sitting in the same position of my legs crossed one way or another because it feels protective. No matter how physically uncomfortable or cramped I get, I can't get myself to switch positions. It even gets to the point where half way through the session my foot or leg gets pins and needles and I still won't switch. It's very frustrating.

Anyone else experience this? Did you tell your T and what did he/she do or say to help you through it? I know I should bring it up, but... :(
 
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Why don't you bring it up? This is just what your T needs to hear so she can work on your trauma with you.

We hold trauma energy undischarged in our bodies. This I would think would be super important to discuss. You can still remain in that position even though you tell your T, and only move if you feel safe.
 
Your self-awareness is great, and it will lead you.

I went through a year of not being able to have my body directly face my therapist. It was a sign of fear that I couldn't tell if it was about the past, or the present, or both.
As it turned out, it was a keen instinctual action. As I opened up and eventually turned toward him, the therapist always needed to dominate, and became mean and demeaning. Talking about it, only escalated him.

Your situation is unique to you. What do you feel influences you to stay, virtually frozen? Does you therapist, or the situation, remind you of someone? Or does your therapist have qualities that make you feel unsafe?

You are discerning your way through this. Good luck!
 
@franciemarnie Thanks for your input. I know it's important to bring up, but I guess I haven't because I'm afraid of drawing attention to it and having to work through it *sigh* :unsure:

Thank you @change. You've brought up some good points. I'm not sure exactly what influences me to stay frozen, but I know that staying that way makes me feel safe and in control of my body. I feel like when switching positions I'm opening up in a way and that feels terrifying. I don't think my therapist reminds me of anyone or has qualities that make me feel unsafe, but there are definitely aspects of being in the session itself that feel "threatening" to me... Even though I know I am perfectly safe.

Which would actually bring me to my next question, how the heck do I bring up the fact that something about the session itself is a huge trigger? :facepalm:
 
every session I get stuck sitting in the same position of my legs crossed one way or another because it feels protective. No matter how psychically uncomfortable or cramped I get, I can't get myself to switch positions. It even gets to the point where half way through the session my foot or leg gets pins and needles and I still won't switch.
Wow, I do exactly this too! I don't have any helpful advice I'm afraid but interested in peoples responses.

how the heck do I bring up the fact that something about the session itself is a huge trigger?
Try writing it down for your therapist. Or starting with I don't know if this is important but... or I've been wondering about... or I notice that... It's not something I've actually thought to raise with my therapist, but there have been other things about the therapy situation itself that we've looked at.
 
Definitely bring your therapist into this.

Since I forget self-care, my therapist and I have worked into the sessions several 'reminders' for me to check-in with my body. She'll say things such as "how about a break for water? Let's try a stretch now. Do you need to throw a pillow?"

Those things are grounding for me, and help me get unstuck. I used to be unable to move in sessions. We discovered that the transferrance with my Cognitive-Behavioral-Therapist was strong and I reacted as if he was my father. My position was me, as a kid, sitting in perfect posture at the dinner table hoping nothing I did set him off into a rage.

My positions got more relaxed as I learned to trust him, as well as providing comforting thoughts to myself.

"He is here to help me. He is NOT my dad. He would never respond to me like my father. I am safe. I can leave this room at any time. I can move however I wish."

I tried out all the chairs in his office. He offered me his. But I didn't do that out of respect for him.

I still have the "freeze" response but my therapist can identify it and gently help me back into today and feelings of safety. Self-awareness is half the battle.

You're doing great. I know it doesn't feel that way, but identifying impediments to therapy is an excellent sign that you are recovering.
 
I do this too - especially when we're getting into traumatic issues I find impossible to speak about. I literally freeze and tense my whole body, especially my legs and feet. But I think my therapist generally notices and reads my body language. She'll usually back off a bit, saying she can see how painful it is for me and my reticence to talk about it. Does your therapist give any acknowledgment or indication that they notice this?
 
@digger1 I'm happy to hear that I'm not the only one, but I'm sorry that you experience this too. Thank you for your advice on what to say and how to bring it up. I feel like there is a lot about the therapy situation itself that is/can be triggering. Guess I know what I'm talking about at my next session...

@BloomInWinter Wow, I like the "reminders" to check in with your body throughout the session. I think I would find this extremely helpful! It sounds like you have a really great therapist. I went for a walk once with my T for a reason unrelated to this, but it was very refreshing. It helped me to feel much more relaxed and unstuck. However, back at the next session I was all tensed up again. Thank you for your encouragement ;)

@Genea Yes, I find that I tense up the most when I'm discussing details of trauma or getting into deeper issues. I have brought this up to my therapist, and we've worked through it, but I haven't mentioned that I get stuck in one position on a regular basis. I'm sure she notices my body language, but she has never said anything about it. However, she is usually mirroring my sitting position and when she switches positions I sometimes wonder if she notices that I don't. Or I wonder if she is purposefully switching positions to get me to. Either way, I'll find myself almost becoming envious that she can switch positions and I can't...ugh :(
 
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