theshadowoftheliving
MyPTSD Pro
Met today with my therapist. I've been trying to be honest with her about everything that is happening with me, which is a struggle - it's so hard to look someone in the eyes and tell them some of the most horrifying and horrible things that have happened to you and that you have done.
I told her some of the stuff that's been happening, none of which I find all that scary, but that she obviously does.
She told me that I'm at the limit of what she can tolerate and if I get any more suicidal or continue to self harm then I can't be seen in her practice anymore. (All the self harm has been super benign, surface scratches, and happens at most once per week). I'm panicked now. Caught between wanting to run away and wanting to try hard and just starting to lie about this stuff to her. I feel like she's over reacting. I was seen outpatient years ago when I was self harming up to five times a day and was scary suicidal/made suicide attempts. Nothing I'm experiencing now seems that bad.
Am I over reacting? Is she? I'm so confused by all of this.
I told her some of the stuff that's been happening, none of which I find all that scary, but that she obviously does.
She told me that I'm at the limit of what she can tolerate and if I get any more suicidal or continue to self harm then I can't be seen in her practice anymore. (All the self harm has been super benign, surface scratches, and happens at most once per week). I'm panicked now. Caught between wanting to run away and wanting to try hard and just starting to lie about this stuff to her. I feel like she's over reacting. I was seen outpatient years ago when I was self harming up to five times a day and was scary suicidal/made suicide attempts. Nothing I'm experiencing now seems that bad.
Am I over reacting? Is she? I'm so confused by all of this.