• 💖 [Donate To Keep MyPTSD Online] 💖 Every contribution, no matter how small, fuels our mission and helps us continue to provide peer-to-peer services. Your generosity keeps us independent and available freely to the world. MyPTSD closes if we can't reach our annual goal.

Traumatiser Approached Me At Work

Status
Not open for further replies.
N

Niju

Long story short.. 18 month ago someone i was seeing n meant the world to me attempted suicide. We had been arguing n i was unaware of her mental state n long story short her family blamed me. They asked to speak to me at my job, said something had happened then in front of everyone blamed me for it. Mum n bro threatened me, called me names etc then left. I was in shock/traumatised then one month later threatened again then dad came looking for me. Got police involved who told them to stay away, work told me they were barred. I suffered with ptsd then bro keeps showing up glaring me out, laughing at me every couple of months. Work said they werent barred after all so had to put up with it, then 3 weeks ago bro and his partner whos always stood laughing with him approached me. I've had no contact with any of them since that day. Refused service, they act dumb. Stayed calm, they insisted to speak to a manager and i kept refusing service, i wasnt afraid i just made it clear i knew it was a windup attempt, then i started to get angry n made it clear i knew what they were doing. they left. They were incredibly angry i didnt serve them, but the anger i felt? My god... for a full week i was so angry, then happier than ive ever been, then sad? Work are now barring them, n i have to wait for them to show to make it official. Ive had like a years worth of therapy that helped me a great deal and although i dont entirely feel very afraid i feel a great mix of sad and anger with a bit of happyness. Why is this? Also, how can i deal with my anxiety etc? I feel i am getting better as time goes on, but i was alarmed at the effect them approaching me had. It felt like the wound was ripped open, is this normal with ptsd?
 
Sounds like you did a wonderful job of standing up for yourself! Do you feel more empowered? If I had done something similar, I know my therapist would tell me how strong I was becoming by not being a victim anymore and allowing, as well as recognizing, the feelings is a healthy step.
 
Get a restraining order to back up the work decision - then they can't change their minds.
 
Is that possible though? I'm in the UK, I could base it on obviously the threats/harassment but would I have to bring the emotional trauma into it to secure it? I'm willing to do that to be honest if it works, though obviously I would rather not. Also I keep getting anxiety, gotta wait till they come down to bar them so is there anything I can do to help deal with it?
 
You should be able to get a restraining order based on the threats alone, provided you have some evidence of them -- anything on your phone? email? If not, it might be difficult.
 
Threats were year and half ago, and verbal so no proof :s
 
What exactly does the family think you did to her? Seems strange that they would be persisting with this after so long.
 
Your workplace banning them should be very strong evidence in your favor.
 
The police report from the earlier police involvement should also help your case.

Are you in therapy?
 
I'm unclear on if she died or if she has had a disability from the attempt or not. Sorry to be blunt.

I feel like I'm missing key information. Maybe I'm just tired.
 
The family blame me for her attempting suicide. The gist was at the time that if I had left and been with her, as in a proper relationship, she would have never done the attempt... She was doing a lot of bad things to me herself, manipulating me emotional abuse etc. I was in therapy four months ago, had been for nine months total but I felt it was no longer needed but this encounter has brought some stuff back up (such as fight/flight response sometimes). I have had ZERO contact since, and as I say they are STILL coming down and I don't know why they're still interested in me. I think they still blame me and are using me as an outlet, instead of looking at themselves. I'm waiting till they come back for me to go for a restraining order, at the moment it's more about making sure I can manage my own emotions better? Such as the anxiety I feel sometimes etc
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top