Candleflames
MyPTSD Pro
I do a lot of these. I pull out the hair on my scalp to the point of having bald patches. I pick at everything: fingernails, cuticles, bug bites, moles and freckles, fuzzies on my shirt. I pick at something till it bleeds or till I rip a hole in my shirt.
It's the trich that really makes me feel like a freak. How soothing it is. How sometimes I don't even realize I'm doing it. How other times it's very ritualistic. How I'll think self depreciative thoughts and even that feels good. I did some searching and found other peoples posts that mention this issue but no thread about it.
I thought it might be nice to have a thread to talk about our experiences, how it makes us feel, what we are doing about it and so on. Deep breath and I'll go first.
So I started pulling out my eyelashes when I was 11 or so. Plucked them clean gone, every last one. Then started on my scalp hair. Did that for only a couple of years and then just stopped. About the same time I stopped pulling I started trying drugs. I did whatever my parents had lying around. This is when the skin picking started.
Fast forward to my mid-twenties and I am married have a kid been off drugs for about 5 years and am going back to school. I didn't even notice what I was doing at first. This time my scalp also hurts. It feels like great pressure under the skin and I need to get whatever is causing it out. It drives me nuts. I start using tweezers, thinking if I can just find the one hair that is causing the hurt it will all go away. That doesn't work and I am so frustrated. I go to my gp and she looks at me like I've sprouted arms out of my ears. I'm so mortified that it takes me another 10 years before I'll bring it up with another doctor.
I want to stop pulling so now I am looking at therapists who specialize in these types of disorders. I'm lucky there are quite a few in my region. I'm hoping they will be willing to work with me and my current T for a set amount of time.
Anybody else out there dealing with this issue? Have you found anything that helps or have you found a T that has helped?
It's the trich that really makes me feel like a freak. How soothing it is. How sometimes I don't even realize I'm doing it. How other times it's very ritualistic. How I'll think self depreciative thoughts and even that feels good. I did some searching and found other peoples posts that mention this issue but no thread about it.
I thought it might be nice to have a thread to talk about our experiences, how it makes us feel, what we are doing about it and so on. Deep breath and I'll go first.
So I started pulling out my eyelashes when I was 11 or so. Plucked them clean gone, every last one. Then started on my scalp hair. Did that for only a couple of years and then just stopped. About the same time I stopped pulling I started trying drugs. I did whatever my parents had lying around. This is when the skin picking started.
Fast forward to my mid-twenties and I am married have a kid been off drugs for about 5 years and am going back to school. I didn't even notice what I was doing at first. This time my scalp also hurts. It feels like great pressure under the skin and I need to get whatever is causing it out. It drives me nuts. I start using tweezers, thinking if I can just find the one hair that is causing the hurt it will all go away. That doesn't work and I am so frustrated. I go to my gp and she looks at me like I've sprouted arms out of my ears. I'm so mortified that it takes me another 10 years before I'll bring it up with another doctor.
I want to stop pulling so now I am looking at therapists who specialize in these types of disorders. I'm lucky there are quite a few in my region. I'm hoping they will be willing to work with me and my current T for a set amount of time.
Anybody else out there dealing with this issue? Have you found anything that helps or have you found a T that has helped?