musiclover2911
New Here
Hi. I'm new here.
For the last 5 years or so, I've had several recurring nightmares of me being raped. Although, I'm sure I've never been raped. But the first nightmare I just remember seeing a shadow of a man pinning me down. It felt extremely real like if I was awake and someone was on top of me. I remember waking up breathing heavily, shaking, and too scared to go back to sleep. I thought it was just a one-time nightmare but I've been having them ever since. --- I've had an incident where a friend has tried to take advantage of a situation (no longer friends with him) and I've only been depressed once due to that incident but have struggled with trust issues and never liked it when a man stared or touched me (even if it wasn't in a sexual way). I'm also VERY paranoid due to the incident that happened with this "friend" in March. -- When I was in middle school this same friend would touch my waist several times and pull me next to him. I'd walk fast but he'd catch up and do it again. I don't remember if he put his hand lower or not but I blocked that memory out of my mind all these years and it's starting to come back. I've also had an image stuck in my head of a hand on my leg for about 4 days and recently had, what seemed like a flashback for a split sec or 2 of me sitting on a couch swing and someone coming over and putting their hand on leg. I had a mini panic attack. Idk if this is just a false memory or what. But it's starting to freak me out. Why can't I remember if something happened?
For the last 5 years or so, I've had several recurring nightmares of me being raped. Although, I'm sure I've never been raped. But the first nightmare I just remember seeing a shadow of a man pinning me down. It felt extremely real like if I was awake and someone was on top of me. I remember waking up breathing heavily, shaking, and too scared to go back to sleep. I thought it was just a one-time nightmare but I've been having them ever since. --- I've had an incident where a friend has tried to take advantage of a situation (no longer friends with him) and I've only been depressed once due to that incident but have struggled with trust issues and never liked it when a man stared or touched me (even if it wasn't in a sexual way). I'm also VERY paranoid due to the incident that happened with this "friend" in March. -- When I was in middle school this same friend would touch my waist several times and pull me next to him. I'd walk fast but he'd catch up and do it again. I don't remember if he put his hand lower or not but I blocked that memory out of my mind all these years and it's starting to come back. I've also had an image stuck in my head of a hand on my leg for about 4 days and recently had, what seemed like a flashback for a split sec or 2 of me sitting on a couch swing and someone coming over and putting their hand on leg. I had a mini panic attack. Idk if this is just a false memory or what. But it's starting to freak me out. Why can't I remember if something happened?