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Why Are We Here? What is The Purpose?

Discussion in 'General' started by Grama-Herc, Jun 11, 2007.

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  1. Grama-Herc

    Grama-Herc I'm a VIP

    What exactly do any of us expect to get out of this forum? What IS the purpose of participating? Are we helping each other or simply making ourselves more agitated, agressive and miserable with each visit? What are we suppose to talk about? Our feelings, our pain or what the cats did today?
    Why do we try to engage someone we do not know to enter into our life? We start by reading posts about like symptoms and end up in a horrible state of mind spinning out of control AND THIS is help? What are we trying to accomplish here? Can someone enlighten me Please. Cuz I certianly don't get it.

    This of course could be my illness talking but the words are coming from deep in my soul! I want friends and simply can not figure out how to get anyone to respond to me.

    This has only served to prove once again that I am unlikeable and deserve to spend my life alone. I do not know how to be around people. My social skills are null and void. Hell, I have no social skills

    Sorry to vent so loud, guess it's a bad day. But what do I have to do to get someone--anyone to share with me.???
    p?
     
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  3. permban0077

    permban0077 Policy Enforcement Banned

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    Not to feel alone in a world that I thought I was. And I have found it.

    To learn to heal with people like you.

    When needed, but we should make sure we take breaks so not to be overwhelmed and why the sticky about the forum being a trigger here.

    All. My husband and I celebrated our anniversary today, no kids in the house and I am wrapping things up with this quick post. We talked and laughed about how our FIXED cats get more action than us. So there is your cat chat. :)

    For me it was a shit load easier than facing someone and a good stepping stone. I was not judged. I was given a helping hand. And when I did not want it, a push when slipping. I was ready to try to not be all alone anymore.

    Again why we should take the forum in bites. Not all at once. I am not there for people I was before right now as I have my own issues. I take on what I can emotionally handle right now. And just approving posts sometimes wipes me out and I cannot respond to many people. I am learning to pace myself. But see your post is pretty basic and not over whelming.

    Leaning we are not alone. Learning tips to work through the crap days. I have to re read to get through. I was given a lot of damn good advice I have to look at again right now since I am in a bad month, not all days are good. Then we come here.

    All BS and a bad day, you have people here and you know it.


    No apologies, we all need to vent, so I guess another answer to your questions. You can vent. We all have bad days and need a vent.
     
  4. anthony

    anthony Renovation Aficionado Founder

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    Why Are We Here? What is The Purpose?

    Well, we are here because we are looking for others who know what we suffer, instead of only those who "think" they know what we suffer.

    The purpose is easy if you want it to be, and that is to help yourself. To help yourself is to get you talking about your trauma, to get you opening up and releasing the pain you hold within you, the very pain in which is constantly triggering your syptoms to fire. Symptoms of PTSD are caused by our inner pain due to trauma, the pain we hold within us, the pain we hide, the pain we often have never resolved, regardless how much we have talked about it, we have not truly come to terms with it, or we simply have lied, put up a mask, a front, in order to cope in society and life, not actually live. We fool ourselves and others into thinking we are normal just like everyone else, when in fact we are hiding our pain and causing ourselves more as we travel life itself.

    The purpose is to help yourself, nothing more, nothing less. Nobody can help any person if they don't want to help themselves first. Educate yourself as much as you can on PTSD, bounce ideas of others, look within yourself to every negative aspect of your life, and ensure you remove every negative with positives, or atleast accept if a negative is a negative and remove the stigma associated with it. We cannot remove our memories, nor change our pasts, but we can come to terms with it, we can accept what has happened happened, and nothing we do now can change it, though how we live with it we do control.

    So much to say on this one really... its an open ended topic. Nice thread herc...
     
  5. batgirl

    batgirl I'm a VIP

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    I can relate to everything you wrote herc, I've felt all those things and asked myself all of those questions at one point or another while a member here. At this point I'm kind of being anti-social moreso than I used to be, still trying to post but mostly posting in my diary, not terribly interested in the "fun" threads or in making friends. That's not to be rude to anyone or say I haven't made any friends here... I have... but that was not my reason for joining the forum in the first place. I joined to help myself, and I think I've been able to do that to an extent. Making friends was just kind of a fringe benefit. It hasn't been all great though because I've also been hurt by people, more than once, which I guess would happen in "real life" too but I have found it hard to deal with. It is a learning process though and I am grateful for that, I think I am learning how to be a better friend, and learning from my mistakes and the mistakes of other people.
     
  6. jods

    jods Well-Known Member

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    From a spouse perspective-
    I'm here to learn & gather more pieces of the ptsd puzzle so I can help myself & those around me to try to understand what it is like to see the world through your eyes so I can try & help my husbands journey.
    I am grateful for all of you that are brave enough to share your life & stories.
     
  7. Portabella

    Portabella Well-Known Member

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    Herc, I used to write letters and then throw them away when something was a real hurdle for me. Now, I voice it and alot of times it becomes clearer. This forum is not a quick fix by no means, but it does help at times. It also gives me somewhere where I don't feel so obsolete and alone. I too have felt left out of things, however from reading other people's posts and what is replied to them by Anthony, Evie, Veiled, and so on, I learn tools that help me. You can take or leave it, but at least any tool is better than being alone with an empty toolbox. I wish you well on your search for healing and hope to interact with you more in the future, as our boats may be different colored or shapes but we are all in the same boat or sorts.
     
  8. anthony

    anthony Renovation Aficionado Founder

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    Well said port...
     
  9. sparta21

    sparta21 Member

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    I'm new here, but would like to say that it is a relief to find a place to vent and to see that I'm not alone. There is an intrinsic connection I feel to others who have suffered trauma. It is often impossible for me to read stuff about PTSD, because it often causes me to have overwhelming feelings of pain. But overall, I notice that the realization of not being the only one who feels this way to be helpful. I'm just getting started with trying to heal, but sites like this make me hopeful.
     
  10. Grama-Herc

    Grama-Herc I'm a VIP

    I thank each and every one of you who have responded to my hissy fit. I guess we all need to throw a fit now and then. It does help to have you guys to listen. I am so overwhelmed these days by so many things that I found myself literally walking in circles in my living room this evening.
     
  11. sparta21

    sparta21 Member

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    I identify with your pacing. I often tend to sort of sit and stare at small dust balls and what not in the corners of my apartment. If I were paid for this, I'd be a millionare by now. Anyway, let's all hope for the best. Sometimes, that's all we can do.
     
  12. goingonhope

    goingonhope Member Premium Member

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    Sounds like a fantastic series of goals & purpose. I'm still so very appreciative and grateful that such a forum exists for this purpose.

    Anthony, I really like the way you've answered Herc's question here. And, I thought it a good idea to bump it forward and make it more readily available.

    Yes, it is a nice thread Herc, and just another good reason to make it available, just in case anyone else wants to share here as well.

    Hope
     
  13. Grama-Herc

    Grama-Herc I'm a VIP

    Hope

    Thank you for reviving this. I had forgotten it was even written. I hope we get more input. Re reading it has helped me this evening balance my emotions and I certainly needed it.
     
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