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Work Related Trauma - My Story

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PTSD sufferer

MyPTSD Pro
Hi,

I have been a new member of this forum for a few weeks now and have only just mustered up the courage to post about my trauma. So here it is.

I worked for a few years under the management of a man who had a personality disorder. He was a terrible manager and terrorised me constantly, not just with nasty comments and common place bullying, but with threats of physical violence and sexual harassment.

He threatened to 'cut me a smile' with knife, he exposed himself to me, put public hair in my coffee, tried to drug me with his medication (by putting it in my coffee), peed in a cup and tipped it all over me and my office. He went through my suitcase and stole my underwear. He told a hotel receptionist that I was his daughter and got a key to my hotel room on a business trip. He threatened me constantly and called me all sorts of names. He destroyed my reputation, stalked me, watched me through a hole in the wall and terrorised me.

I reported him to HR (who had documentation saying he had a personality disorder) and they said I was acting crazy and paranoid, I reported him to the Union and they dismissed him as 'just a bully', I reported him to his boss and she promised to move me - she never did.

Finally, when he held up a meeting with the same knife he threatened to kill me with, they believed and instead of taking charge themselves, they sent me in to talk him down...but did they move me away from him?...no. Did they help me at all...no. They didn't want it to happen to them.

The manager and his boss were eventually fired, but (although I tried) I did not have enough proof to take my manager and the company to court. I regret not getting enough proof of what was going on, and I'm very angry at the company and my colleagues who saw what he was doing and chose not to act on it for fear of loosing their own jobs. I am also very jealous of anyone who has the opportunity to take their abuser to court....I wish I had that opportunity.

I now have to suffer with PTSD whilst he has moved on to managing another team in another company. It pains me to think he could be doing the exact same thing to another person...but there is nothing I can do about it. I feel helpless.

I'm sure this all sounds pretty surreal to you all....its not an easy thing for people to believe. Regardless, this is my story...
 
Welcome;

This guy sounds like a real sicko. I'm so sorry you had to endure all that, and with no support.

I guess I just want to let you know you aren't alone with the workplace stuff. I have CPTSD from multiple traumas, one of them being a sick control freak who made my life a living hell at work, staulked me, and generally bullied me. He didn't do all that other stuff though. But it ended with him and his dog shoving a finger in my chest and I couldn't calm him down for the life of me. I had to finally contact a lawyer after telling my supervisors many times and nothing happened. Finally, he was fired and I was punished psychologically by the owner and threatened and intimidated.

I think in no way this was the cause of my PTSD. I had a very abusive childhood and a rape before that. But the stress of this situation caused my breakdown and that was over 15 years ago. I have never been the same since. Looking back, I really wish I'd taken action to sue their a*ses, but I was too scared, devastated and financially vulnerable. I even gave the f*ckers two weeks notice when I left....talk about a tried and true victim.

Anyway, I know you are feeling shaky........but if you can sue these people, I'd go for it. This situation took away your life and left with with a devastating potentially life long chronic anxiety disorder..........
sick em I say.
 
Hi PTSD Sufferer,

I was shocked at the horror you suffered in the workplace, without support, and the fact that he got away with it. It is amazing that no one would take action, even after the meeting; so he goes to another company to terrorize. I don't know how anyone in good conscience can condone any action of that type in the workplace and they should be sued. Have you been able to work after this? Did you ever try to file a workers compensation claim? I hope you are able to find some legal recourse. Sometimes it seems that only loss of money will motivate people to act decently.

I hope you find the support you need here to help you heal.

Take care.
ITL
 
Thanks for the supportive comments. I wish I could sue. There was a security video of him terrorising me repeatedly that I tried to get my hands on. This is what eventually got to the union and then they believed me and got it to the CEO. I quit because they asked me to stay in the room next to him until he was heavily medicated and stable. I have wanted to chase the union and the security guy and another co-worker who witnessed his actions, but the company put a tight lid on it all for obvious reasons and silenced everyone. I wish I could do more, I wish I could sue, but without the video proof there is little of a case. My partner does not think I should pursue these people for the evidence. I think everyone wants me to live in the present and get on with my life, but I feel I need closure to move on.

I am not working. I used to be a successful career woman. I have two degrees and was a manager at 23. By 25 I was at a MNC managing multiple markets in the Asia Pacific region. I no longer am working and I miss my career enormously.

I am doing my third degree (a Masters) and I was hoping that this would expose me to not only career options, but teach me how better to handle workplace environments. Not sure if it is going to work as the study is stressful and many topics trigger me, let alone having to work with people gain. It all seems too much sometimes, its like who I used to be (a career woman) has gone and now all that is left is a fearful social recluse. God only knows if I am going about this the right way... I don't know if it is possible to get back who I was and when reading these forums it sounds really difficult to manage work and PTSD together, which makes me think I will never be that person again. That's pretty depressing...
 
I am stunned and very sorry that he treated you this way (nobody should be treated like that). Right now, I'm trying to control my response. I have a small trigger when it comes to people shaming and abusing others this way.

I wonder if anyone else experienced this horrible behavior? Perhaps a class action lawsuit?
 
I am so sorry this is a trigger for you Sethe. I honestly didn't think about that before posting. I am so sorry.

Thanks for the suggestion. I'm afraid it was just me he targeted at the company. When others were asked to be his target after my incident they ran to the union and got moved pretty quickly. I recall overhearing a conversation his wife had with his boss where she was saying that it had happened before at his previous job and the girl ended up in a mental institution because of it. Short of hiring a PI to try to track her down (with no name to go by), I have no way of filing a class action lawsuit. Sounds pretty hopeless doesn't it...
 
My symptoms were triggered by a stalker who did things that are equally difficult to believe as what your boss did. I just want to say give treatment a try. I noticed a lot of different options and ideas for healing and treatment just reading the message boards today. For myself, I received 3 months of intensive therapy and took Prozac for three months. I was very fortunate in that, although the medication was too strong for me and caused undesired side effects, it also had the effect of reducing the really bad symptoms so the therapy had a chance to work. I continue to receive therapy less-often.

I have an extremely difficult boss right now and have for the past 6 years. Let me put it to you this way - she told me yesterday that SHE had PTSD. She has not been diagnosed, but she does have other health issues that could I guess cause some of the behaviors.

All I can say is seek help, try not to isolate yourself and never forget that you did nothing to cause this. Your boss sounds so mentally-ill and . . . well . . . evil. I know this topic is debated, but I believe in evil. Some people are just plain evil and hurt others so much. Don't forget that others are also good. And that we can definitely heal.
 
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