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Wrapping Up Therapy February 2017!

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Panda Bear

MyPTSD Pro
Lol, that's the plan anyway!

T and I have started to plan an exit strategy and it's looking like end of February 2017 will mark the end of our weekly work. That puts us at just 6wks shy of 5 solid years of work together :D

It's my choice how it ends and what I want things to look like. I'm going to visit 1x a month till summer and then fly solo till fall(October) and then pop back in just to check up and make sure I don't slide into the ugly anniversary months of Oct-Jan. But we will be ending our major hard work and the rest of the visits will be just to chat, unless something happens!! I am prepared for setbacks, they happen too. So while the plan is set, T has assured that he will make time for me and always allow me back. He's not leaving....

This is nerve wracking, happy, sad, mad, I feel a bit abandoned.....I've had a great tharspist! One guy, one try, one chance to trust and he stood by me for nearly 5yrs! It's been awesome, wild, hairy, scary and unreal.

Still, everyday I'll have to work hard to use my skills in order to stay well. Learn that I'm human and will slide backwards. PTSD will always live inside me, but it won't always have to dictate my life any longer. I'm the same scared little girl I was when I first walked into his office. Frightened at every turn, broken, sad and alone.

Anyways, just wanted to share. I'm scared.....but it's a good thing.
 
Wow what a big life change. Good for you. I've finally started with a therapist. It's been 7 months and I'm definitely very attached and I can't imagine how this will end...Glad to hear you have such a well thought out exit strategy. I don't want to be a lifer but I see how that can happen.

Good luck to you! Sounds like you don't need luck though. :)
 
That's awesome. I am curious how you made this decision, if you don't mind sharing. For example, did you define goals at the beginning and you've met those goals? Do you feel you have symptoms that you have learned to manage that will always be there and others that have gone away? I'm asking in an attempt to imagine the future! ;-)
 
Sorry for the delay @watundah

We made the decision together, it was a mutual understanding. T keeps his mind full of goals that he'd like to see me meet. We've covered them before, but don't harp on them. We tend to measure success by behavior, coping skills, bounce back ability....if there is such a word.

Can I remain present during sessions....

Can I bounce back after being triggered...

Do I recover after sessions, as in how many days does it take me to get back to a baseline....it used to take the whole week, and not its a 24hr turn around. Even after we cover crazy hard stuff...

Am I able to work with him, back and forth. Can I participate with out digging in and freaking out. We seriously used to cover one tiny detail, it would take the full hour for me to talk and say or answer one simple question. I would shut down at the smallest stressor. Him shifting in his chair......

Happy.....more happy, less sad. When we can pop off jokes and sibling like jabs, then life is good! I can talk serious, but turn a joke 2min later. It's our relationship :p.

I don't hid things from him anymore...

He can ask tough questions and I can answer and not loose my shit, I'm more stable, secure, sure, safe. Can take compliments, accept I have purpose.

Friendships. I can share my story!

Really, if I make it through the Oct-Jan hell and be 80%.....we're calling it a success.
 
@watundah

There really is a lot to this and I'm not 100% sure of how to explain it all. I think it boils down to a few basics, with the most important piece being this: I am capable, strong, emotionally resilient, trusting, new relationships, strong foundations, vulnerable and accepting.....

So......I'm living life like I was meant to, many years ago.

Inside and out, I'm NOT THE SAME PERSON THST WALKED INTO HIS OFFICE 4 yrs ago
 
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