S
S t e v e n
Well here goes, I am very hesitant to admit this openly for fear of being looked down on due to the fact it was caused in boot camp. I have dealt with PTSD for approx 12 years now, but suffered the previous x amount before seeking help. I know it's not called post traumatic combat stress. But still feel guilty about how mine became. I know many have seen the movie "Full Metal Jacket", and the boot camp scene's IMHO are nothing compared what I went through in boot camp. We had 2 but 1 specific drill instructor who unbeknownst to me at the time crossed the line in major ways. Some of the things I Seen or went through were 1 recruit was dragged around the the squad bay to mop the floor and was slammed into the bunk legs continually and had 2-4 ribs broken. (Just because the DI didn't like him) Another was taken into the whiskey locker and physically assaulted (aka beaten) myself I was hit in the head with a metal object so hard it left a goose egg lump. Another & I were also ordered to be beaten and myself I just remember 20 guys coming at me punching and ultimately being kicked until I literally shit my pants as I lay on the ground while trying to protect myself. Then not allowed to clean up and go out and finish the day to include eat chow & drill with shit still in my pants. The last thing I'll mention is the whole platoon was ordered to wash each other's balls. At which time another drill instructor showed up and put a stop to it. I heard 2 years later the main DI who did this was court martialed and dishonorably discharged. This is just a fraction of what went on. It's been so bad I've ruined my relationship with my parents, wife kids and friends. I am currently trying to mend these relationships but after years of taking my abuse now my family has their own issues and it makes it real difficult on everyone. I do feel I have come always from where I have been but now I have a whole different set of challenges to deal with. Some days I win, some days I lose, but everyday I fight. Or at least try. I've had a rough few days and found this sight and had to share it helps me knowing I'm not alone... Steven