SeekingAfrica
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I admit I am the type that loves organization, but I get in a bad period, things get messy in 2 seconds flat.
Now I'm in a high stress period. I was semi-coping with it for a while, but today it hit me in ...let's not say the worst way, I've had harder days.... but my productivity was at like 20% of normal. So I got few work stuff(simple onces). And nothing else. The day started uninspired, but then it went worse and worse, until I found myself frozen and anxious, and everything normal took so much effort. I did the work stuff that was urgent. All else kept being pushed forward. And forward. I struggled with some dark thoughts. I spend way too much time either doing nothing, or taking a long time doing super small things that normally would take in times less. More dark throughts, even when I pushed myself out of it(distractions, going outside for a bit...). And we get to now... Like I literally got in the shower and did not have the energy to wash my hair and have to dry it after. I just sat under burning hot water and I couldn't move.
How do I clean on such days? There are hard days ahead, I need to deal with some stuff, and I hate that meanwhile, my home is never feeling ready for guests. And then I avoid seeing some people that were meant to come to my place. And of course whenever my home is spotless it's a lot better for my own sake, I definitely appreciate it.
But today, I just literally couldn't move. Like making sandwich for dinner now feels like too much energy.
I really broke down today. I don't know how I got to this, but ended up making braindump of all I could do tomorrow to improve the situation, having to reschedule 1 meeting for tomorrow morning and maybe one on Saturday to lighten my load, cause I just can't. Like, I couldn't wash my hair and now the energy to make myself simple sandwich for dinner feels like great effort.. So over it. Sorry for the rant.
If anyone has advice on managing cleaning it will greatly help.
Also, I have history with sciatica back pain so extreme physical effort in one time is not good idea.... hence why I need to do the daily cleaning to keep stuff in control.
Sorry everyone.
Long day.
Now I'm in a high stress period. I was semi-coping with it for a while, but today it hit me in ...let's not say the worst way, I've had harder days.... but my productivity was at like 20% of normal. So I got few work stuff(simple onces). And nothing else. The day started uninspired, but then it went worse and worse, until I found myself frozen and anxious, and everything normal took so much effort. I did the work stuff that was urgent. All else kept being pushed forward. And forward. I struggled with some dark thoughts. I spend way too much time either doing nothing, or taking a long time doing super small things that normally would take in times less. More dark throughts, even when I pushed myself out of it(distractions, going outside for a bit...). And we get to now... Like I literally got in the shower and did not have the energy to wash my hair and have to dry it after. I just sat under burning hot water and I couldn't move.
How do I clean on such days? There are hard days ahead, I need to deal with some stuff, and I hate that meanwhile, my home is never feeling ready for guests. And then I avoid seeing some people that were meant to come to my place. And of course whenever my home is spotless it's a lot better for my own sake, I definitely appreciate it.
But today, I just literally couldn't move. Like making sandwich for dinner now feels like too much energy.
I really broke down today. I don't know how I got to this, but ended up making braindump of all I could do tomorrow to improve the situation, having to reschedule 1 meeting for tomorrow morning and maybe one on Saturday to lighten my load, cause I just can't. Like, I couldn't wash my hair and now the energy to make myself simple sandwich for dinner feels like great effort.. So over it. Sorry for the rant.
If anyone has advice on managing cleaning it will greatly help.
Also, I have history with sciatica back pain so extreme physical effort in one time is not good idea.... hence why I need to do the daily cleaning to keep stuff in control.
Sorry everyone.
Long day.