I am new to myptsd.com - 50 year old female.
Over the years, I have struggled with depression and suicide (thoughts and attempts). I use my knowledge and tools and get along well for a while, but about every ten years, I have a major episode that impacts my life significantly. In the past I have been diagnosed with depression, PTSD, PMDD, and most recently bipolar disorder.
Over the years, I have used talk-therapy and I have had couple of sessions of EMDR, but didn't get past the background sessions needed to go into the active work of the therapy. The most beneficial therapy that I received was actually when I worked with a life coach and unfortunately, he passed in 2018. He taught me about co-dependency and use of the enneagram to better understand myself so that I could try to maintain life at health levels.
I didn't commit to prescription therapy until my late forties (2017) and I am still working to find what works for me. One combination of prescriptions was working well until they determined that it was stressing my liver. I tried to discontinue prescriptions at that point, but that attempt failed profusely. I currently take 40mg of prozac, but I am struggling with fleeting suicidal thoughts, productivity, lack of interest, extreme worry and anxiety - just all the things that suck monkey balls.
I have insurance (KP-PMO) with appointments 2-3 months out and I have access to Calm, Ginger (my first appt is today), and myStrength mobile applications. I've explored Calm and myStrength pretty extensively and will see how Ginger goes later today.
Does anyone have recommendations on mobile, online programs, or audio books that might help me get along until the real world support becomes more routine/available?
I struggle with committing and maintaining habits, so anything that has a good process around accountability would be helpful.
Over the years, I have struggled with depression and suicide (thoughts and attempts). I use my knowledge and tools and get along well for a while, but about every ten years, I have a major episode that impacts my life significantly. In the past I have been diagnosed with depression, PTSD, PMDD, and most recently bipolar disorder.
Over the years, I have used talk-therapy and I have had couple of sessions of EMDR, but didn't get past the background sessions needed to go into the active work of the therapy. The most beneficial therapy that I received was actually when I worked with a life coach and unfortunately, he passed in 2018. He taught me about co-dependency and use of the enneagram to better understand myself so that I could try to maintain life at health levels.
I didn't commit to prescription therapy until my late forties (2017) and I am still working to find what works for me. One combination of prescriptions was working well until they determined that it was stressing my liver. I tried to discontinue prescriptions at that point, but that attempt failed profusely. I currently take 40mg of prozac, but I am struggling with fleeting suicidal thoughts, productivity, lack of interest, extreme worry and anxiety - just all the things that suck monkey balls.
I have insurance (KP-PMO) with appointments 2-3 months out and I have access to Calm, Ginger (my first appt is today), and myStrength mobile applications. I've explored Calm and myStrength pretty extensively and will see how Ginger goes later today.
Does anyone have recommendations on mobile, online programs, or audio books that might help me get along until the real world support becomes more routine/available?
I struggle with committing and maintaining habits, so anything that has a good process around accountability would be helpful.