couragetogrow

@whiteraven @Muttly thank you o much for sharing your stories of positive relationship experiences. They give hope.

I am 51. Really just started getting into relationships about 5 or so years ago? And ... I will deny this later (haha) but my current...

I get what you're saying. I grew up in a home where my mom had NO power, no say, no anything. We were both miserable. But I was in a...

I am a big fat ghoster. I find the term a bit funny because it only really became that relevant in very recent years. ‘When I...

Yes...this makes a lot of sense. I actually don't want more contact, but feel obligated to still maintain contact/say yes to things I...

Yep yep. IF they do this, THEN I am going to do that. Unsurprisingly, how someone feels about something usually changes how they...

I think if you'd prefer more contact (and there's nothing wrong with that necessarily) that would be expressing a need or want, vs a...

Yes absolutely, I more-so was saying that I can see how he may have felt like I was shutting him out and I can see how that can...

Is blame the only thing this can be? How about, it's your responsibility if you want to better your relationships but not your fault...

We have to manifest it! It is very hard though to keep that mindset. I guess it is just because I feel my feelings so intensely...

I relate to this so much. I actually had a past boyfriend that was offering to help me out with something and I was like "no I got it"...

Cramps

Of course it can happen, and it is, I think, independent of trauma or not. You aren’t just four letters of a psychiatric acronym. When...

Not at all. That's exactly what I was hoping to hear tbh, because even though people say "anything is possible" it's somedays hard to...

Hi @sadchick welcome! I think it's amazing that you haven't given up on yourself and you're working through the misery. It definitely...

This is so beautiful and gives me hope. I feel you girl. Claiming a loving and healthy relationship for both of us!

Hello! From I could remember I have always felt that I was never going to find anyone that will truly love me. My family is...

It's my understanding that the saying of not comparing one's insides to other's outsides refers to pre-assuming if their life looks...

I agree. Comparing yourself to others, especially people without PTSD is generally unhelpful. I was answering the question too, but...

I am on the other side. It took me awhile but I am here. I didn't take for most of my 20s because I wanted to work on myself. I grew up...

Hi all, Last night I went to a support group and I was really inspired by the other members sharing their experiences so candidly. It...

I think that's right. I'm lately aware that pain and hurt are at the core of a lot of destructive behaviors. But when we experience...

yes - I do see both of your points. I realized partly what got me to this point is not speaking up/setting boundaries early on in the...

I did it when I didn't know it was a 'thing'- just 'me' and seemed relevant/ the right thing to do. It was never malicious. (And this is...

😂😂haha pretty much

for sure, my own hypervigilance is a HUGE factor in my own dysfunctional relationships. the more i like you, the more likely i am to...

Somewhere along the spectrum of Nothing/Nada…to…Vitally important to do it well. Depends on exactly how toxic we’re talking about...

Welcome @couragetogrow. I started at a pretty young age to "undo" the damage of a dysfunctional homelife and I commend you for getting...

I get this, it is something that I struggle with a lot. I was taught that "blood is thicker than water, there for family relationships...

Been working on myself a lot lately. Going to therapy, waking up earlier, getting in with my psychiatrist, and trying to take care of my...

Yes - it's like I'm learning a new language lol. I really appreciate these spaces for that reason. It's fascinating how traumatic...

How do you guys feel about going ghost on toxic peeps? I have been evaluating my role in dysfunctional relationships and perhaps it's...

This...me too...but funny how the ones that imprinted this belief have the most conditional love ever and are the most judgemental...

You say you are in an abusive relationship. Easier than what? Leaving? Trying to change an abusive relationship is a long battle...

I love this 💜

i flat-out refused to date for all the reasons you just listed, plus a basketful. i had no plans to marry for all the same reasons. my...

Hello everyone, Has anyone felt that they will not find a healthy romantic partner? I have a dysfunctional family and I have worked so...

I currently have been asking myself the same questions. I can say with certainty that you are never to blame for any sort of physical...

How I perceive this is like a response to life after the trauma is over...feeling guilty over having feelings we perceive as negative...

This!!! Thank you

I feel like it's because they are so layered and enmeshed with how we've learned to relate to others...Often it seems these toxic core...

I thought I had overcome my familial relationship issues and set the proper boundaries for myself. But it seems this is a process that...

Hello all, I'm happy to be here. I have a history of multi-faceted parental abuse with emotionally abusive/neglect/religious undertones...