LeiaFlower

I agree that it’s due to opening up with someone we trust. I think that’s why I guess my inner child got scared. She thought I would...

YES. this happens to me every time. Especially when talking about nightmares. I determined the reason I freeze is because I feel...

I think I’ll try to relax more I think I panicked more because I didn’t understand what was happening. I’m going to try explaining what...

A few times, I've had a freeze response where I couldn't move or speak. Not being able to speak happens more often. I haven't found a...

i've never found a way to consciously break a freeze response. i've had a few of my freeze responses segway into flight, but that was...

I don't exactly freeze but I zone out a lot and my thoughts disappear and I have to pluck myself back and force myself to respond so...

During my therapy session, we were discussing nightmares. I thought I wasn't afraid of them. However, a small voice in my head said "I...

Thank you I need to add these to my list. I have one but I forget to rely on it and instead instantly go to self harm. But there needs...

I quit a few years ago, and the stability definitely didn't come naturally. The stability came because I had to replace self-harm with...

What strategies have helped when the urges of self harm gets worse? And did stability come naturally after self harming or did you find...

I stopped most of my self-harming almost 3 years ago. I still have episodes of it from time to time, but the majority of it has...

This is true, so far the urges has died down. However, a good affirmation can be “Don’t let her win.” I’m hoping it’s strong enough...

I’d start with your family and see how that goes, if it goes well confronting your abuser might too but you also might want to invest...

What about getting justice being a motivator for you to get stable? I know it's cheesy, but the best kind of revenge you can have...

Sadly my main motivation to stopping self harm was to get my memories back. Now I’m at a standstill of not knowing if I want to quit...

I don't think asking your family what they remember or quitting self-harm are bad ideas on their own but in my own experience...

Would asking my family, quitting self, etc. with the purpose of retrieving memories be forcing it? I want to stop self harming...

nor do i mean to sound like i am judging your desires. i mean only that in my own case i was clearly after vengeance and getting what i...

For a moment the words of you, @Sideways , and Arfie was a little disheartening. I thought she would be able to get away with it while...

Is there anyway to ensure that it is true. I want to sue, I want to do something. I don’t want her to get away with it.

How did you get into memory work? Did you have to wait until the memory was there? And I’m also scared that the memories will be false...

thank you for the explanation of groomer. i guess i better start thinking on another word for the work i do with my animals. another one...

Honestly I admire your tenacity. I’d say your going in fully aware of the consequences and potential gains. My suggestion if you’re...

I don’t really know how to respond to this but I’m happy you shared this. I wish I was in a better place for this to click, to sink in...

I wish I could describe the pain of attempting to find solace in confronting someone. The flood of memories attached to that. Honestly...

@Movingforward10 I’ve briefly talked this over with my therapist and she responded the same way Friday did. Basically that it was my...

these are massive issues, and I would (just my opinion and born out of no experience about this) be very cautious about wanting to get...

It's really a hard question to answer because depending on who you generally respond to things and how she responds, anything can...

is "groomer" another word for "mother" in this context? i think of grooming as a thing i do to pets and livestock. i am a farmer, so i...

It's not that you necessarily WOULD, it's more that you could. Have you talked this over with your therapist? Not knowing anything about...

what do you mean? Why would I lose progress? I’m in trauma therapy and EMDR. Not saying this things are a safety net but I have the...

Then talk to her. If you weren’t aware she has EVERY reason to lie, and probably will? My answer would be different. Like how...

I want to talk to the woman who groomed me as a child. I want to know what happened to me. If it was just grooming it if it led to...

I relate completely to people feeling as though a woman can’t be an abuser. People think because a female can’t physically harm as much...

😂 not crazy it’s really cool. I have a lot to work on with my therapist this upcoming session

This sounds nice, did your therapist help with your build this world?

I'm not the best at this yet, but I have found a few things that help. Just being willing to listen to my younger parts without shaming...

Not sure if it will be helpful at all, but I used to drive around in the car with my 1 year old self picture by the stick shift. It...

my eldest foster daughter (currently 6) suffered severe and sudden onset of attachment disorder with the domestic blowout which landed...

Younger me came out again. My friend was arguing with her boyfriend. At first it was just annoying but then I started feel...

😂 yeah I meant soothing not shooting my younger self. Do recommend anything else to reparent myself and to help with younger parts that...

The awareness of this helps somewhat but I genuinely don’t know now if me wanting to have sex with men is because of being in a trauma...

I think this is a good move. You're right that she deserves to have someone that cares and I'm glad that you're helping her. I used to...

I’m not going to lie that’s something I really want to do. To give up and go numb. To detach myself and retraumatize myself because I...

After talking with a fellow member I’ve been trying to be more compassionate to younger me, and she opened up to me. She said “I feel...

Yeah,I blamed younger me too. I had those wishes too. I also wanted to distance myself from younger me. But it's part of us and...

my parents were okay with affection but I was very touch deprived as a kid. Then the groomer came along to I guess rescue me from the...

I agree, good advice. And sometimes csa survivors fall in love with people who are unavailable as a way of maintaining control and...

I guess so, I don’t really like my younger self. I know it isn’t her fault and I shouldn’t blame her, but I do. I wish she did more to...

I’ll definitely check out these books. I love reading about things similar to the inner child theory.