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Does anyone else have ptsd so bad that you cannot tell anyone?

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User88

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I have two separate incidents that have given me PTSD. One of them I can discuss with therapists, my friends and family know about it etc so although it’s difficult, I can at least talk about it sometimes etc
However, my other PTSD was from childhood and I have never and can never talk about it. Does anyone else have it like this where they literally cannot talk about it whatsoever? Occasionally I get flashbacks, but I just push them away and avoid it thinking about it at all costs.
 
Yep --- I had many, many thing I swore I would never tell another human being. Some of them I have learned to cope with and discuss, some I probably never will. Therapy will help you with coping with them - which you need to do even if you don't want to remember. Because the coping skills are how you get better at dealing with the whole ptsd mess. And people here have all sorts of horrible stories, so while you never need to tell them here either, you are with people who can understand what you are going through
 
I find that I shut my mouth about my PTSD. I have started to be a bit more open about it, but it is still very difficult for me and makes my stomach go in knots. I also feel a lot of embarrassment and shame about having PTSD. I think sometimes I go into a lot of denial about the condition. In the past, I have spoken out about it, but it is easily dismissed and forgotten. I think people have known very little about the condition and some do not care to know more about it.
 
Nope, not here.

I have hard time talking current violence, other than if someone makes it a pft, formality, now tell me that & a million other things, over coffee.

Eventually if the past relates to current & not just in my head.

That said, I super compartmentalize who am I telling which parts of the trauma / types, if any.
 
@User88

You said "However, my other PTSD was from childhood and I have never and can never talk about it."

Did the person who did this to you, demand that you never tell? Threaten you that if you ever tell that there would be consequences? Make you promise that you'd never tell?

Abusers/Attackers often do that.
 
User88,

I've had exactly that. One of my physicians, thoroughly familiar with my medical history, was trying to figure out what was going on with me (I've had weight loss, intractable anxiety, palpitations, brain fog, etc.......)

He started asking me some questions, trying to see what was going on in my life that could cause these things. He couldn't find a medical basis for my symptoms. I just DID NOT want to come clean about this, so he kept pressing. I kept deflecting. He kept inquiring and would not let up. So I came clean, but I was literally reliving the trauma the entire time.

It's not that I literally could not talk about it.........I could, and did; but talking about it with a medical professional made it very real.
 
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