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Where do i begin?

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Complex1

New Here
I joined a few weeks ago, haven't posted.
The world is all over the place, masks/no masks....anti-shot/pro-shot.... like we (diagnosd with CPTSD need more? lol)

How do you people do it? How do you deal with things on a daily basis, regadless of your personal stances on masks/jabs.
Not what I want to get into.

Just that the world has changed so much because of it, how are you adapting or coping?
I admittedly went to a casino, it's how I cope. I hate it, it ruins me when I leave, every time.
But when I'm there, it's euphoric, like a drug (never taken any myself) but I don't seem to have a care in the world.
Granted I don't have many friends, because of trust and because of my childhood (abuse) history and later in life (more emotional trauma).

sorry for the ramble, but thank you if you read it.
I'm not so great with words or trying to express my thoughts,, really wish I was.
 
The pandemic changed virtually nothing in my life.

It massively derailed plans I’d had in the works for several years, which was infuriating, but there’s a not short list of other things which could have also derailed those plans.

Which made the past 18mo of pandemic identical to the year and a half before the pandemic, when I was waiting-waiting-waiting (NOT PATIENTLY) for my last year in purgatory to start. So I could kick those plans started. LeSigh. Extra year in purgatory? Fine. f*ck me.

But that’s a very different thing, more of the same, than dealing with a brand new situation.
 
How do you people do it? How do you deal with things on a daily basis
We are all like supermodels, what you see looks great. Just don't look behind the curtain!

This may sound crass but its been wonderful. March 17 2020 I took a couple weeks off because there was a lot of talk about immunodeficient people being at greater risk. Working retail, I figured the risk was too large. I slept 36 of the next 48 hours - which was cumulatively as much sleep as I had had since Christmas.
At that point I knew it was more than a thyroid problem I had been having. Got a hold of my doc and despite the pandemic managed to work through appointments that got me to therapy.

I didn't miss people as my agoraphobia was really bad for a few months. Masks were bad at first but I just got to the place where I took it off. The stress of something over my mouth was too much. Oddly I found people more accepting of no mask with PTSD as the reason than the alternative mask styles I tried.

Frankly, I could never have gotten where I am without the pandemic. I have used this time as much as I can to get better.
 
Hi @Complex1 .

The pandemic has increased my stress and exhaustion and decreased my resources. However, even without ptsd the stress for many is there. So it's ok to cut yourself some slack.

I gambled since a little kid, til I didn't. I wouldn't want to start again, because for me it would mostly be maladaptive. I know I don't have to tell you things like the odds of suicide are 100's of times higher in those who turn to it who gamble, and we pay the highest dues in the world. I'm sorry if it sounds preachy, but because you said when you leave it ruins you every time I'm saying it. For me, it was the world's best distraction, until it was a distraction for other reasons. Plus, I was good at it. For me it was a coping mechanism, for sure, and natural, because I love it (I went through quite a long list of maladaptive coping choices, lol).. But something interesting I once heard, apart from the kick of dopamine of course, is gambling stimulates hope. For a fraction of a second it is there. Idk if you want to keep gambling, but regardless is there anything else that brings hope or peace to you? Any goal, hobby, job, interest, relationship, beliefs, or other things?

I think you write very well and I think you convey much emotion (but I feel the same about writing or finding 'words', too). Welcome to you! ☺️
 
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