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Had flashback in public

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Had a family meal today. Mother was saying a story, describing a room & it ticked me straight back.

Was trying so hard to stay present but it kept pulling me back.

Don’t know how I looked to others.

Is this “normal”?
How do you deal with this?
 
Ugh this happened to me once out enjoying a beautiful sunshine day. I had my mom and husband there they offered support quickly to me. I was out shopping today and saw a lady crying with someone else holding her and walking. Emotions are normal. I didn't think much of the lady crying today besides I hope she feels better.
 
Yeah it used to happen quite a lot in the past year. Addressing the trauma did help, in the meanwhile all I had were the grounding techniques.

Generally when I have flashbacks I don't act on them I just freeze or become unresponsive. In my experience people haven't been exactly supportive of it. They get scared at the dead eyes and the unresponsiveness. So I try to remain present at least on a surface level but I've been told it did sound fake or just weird.

There is a category of emotional flashback that I can get that is super difficult to manage for people around but over time I learned how to ground myself but it's hard. That one kind of demands actions and is more dangerous than just freezing.

It's normal to have flashbacks and or being spaced out when you have PTSD. Not many people can understand it or identify it and respond well unfortunately. Up to a point it's also your responsibility to prevent them of invading function if they do. But yea informing your loved ones if it's safe might give you a better environment to help grounding better.
 
Unfortunately those darn episodes happen. I've made up cards based on what the UK has. It says I have PTSD then Do'S and Don'ts. Originally developed to give to a first responder. But discovered it worked for me if I just list things that work for me. I can read it..like grounding: stomp feet etc. Even as simple as remove myself from area. I can't think of what to do. Also helps when I feel it coming. Usually lie to myself that it won't be that bad and I can hide it.
 
Normal yes...

How I deal: I check the memory and feeling into my "come back to this later" box. Sometimes I forget about it, but it'll come back when it's ready, so I trust my spirit to bring it up or not, when Everything is ready.

Then I reorient myself to the present. If I keep getting pulled backwards, I engage practices to re-present myself. For me, this includes some form of body movement (sitting down, stretching, standing up, flicking my thigh, pinching my arm, twitching my foot, pulling at hair) or a shift in temperature (eating something cold or hot, running hands under hot and then cold and then hot water, going outside, opening a window, whatever is opposite to what *is* right now).

If none of this works and I'm *lost*, I just let it be... knowing Protection is doing its thing and fighting it won't win any battles. If I feel like this makes me look odd, I remove myself from the situation, go wash dishes or go outside or go talk to the cat (etc).

If I manage to re-present myself and I remember later to come back to that flashback, I open the Later Box I put it into earlier when I am calm, alone, and know I have time and energy to look at it properly. I feel the thing, remember the thing, and look at it. I turn it over, poke it, open it up and see what it brings up - guaranteed there is a central message or theme that matches whatever "suffering" is going on, for example for me my common themes are "I'm not safe" or "no one cares" or "I'll never feel at home". After that, I can remember the incident or experience the flashback, but I know it's just reminding me of a thing I already know and have identified, and the memory or flashback loses its pull backwards. Then I can "simply" (🙄) work on the common themes that are self-sabotaging rather than worrying the flashbacks are random or torturous or unmanageable.

Sometimes if my Awake and Present mind can't deal at all with the flashback, I put it in my Dream Request file. These are usually written down in a Dream Request notebook, which I open before I go to sleep. I read over my items, and I notice what my body feels as I read each item. If the reaction to one item is too strong, I leave it and go to the next one, knowing there will be many nights. If none of them :feel: right, I leave it to my subconscious to pick. Sometimes I dream about the thing I picked, sometimes a different thing, sometimes something not even on my list, but still related to the underlying belief ("I'll never know love" etc). I taught myself to lucid dream when I was plagued by assault-related nightmares when I was 16-18 and it is probably The Best Tool I have acquired. It's a universe where you can explore literally anything, try anything, without real life repercussions. Wanna try your hand at murdering people? Go to town. Wanna learn to fly? Done. Wanna be a dragon? Easy. It may be the only universe where what we want is possible - justice included.

I hope this helps in some way... you are not powerless when flashbacks happen, but you do have to experiment with what works for you, and this can mean failing fantastically. Try to do that surrounded by safe people or in safe spaces and gain confidence with your coping strategies. But don't simply cope - take your power back and tell the flashbacks where to go so you can deal with them later. And then deal with them later. Don't let them rot in the box - they will rot, and they will not bury themselves.

🤗
 
it's normal for me. i've been told by people who know me well that there are not many outward signs that it is happening. that makes it all the more embarrassing when i find myself arguing with the flashback instead of continuing the civil conversation in the present.

oopsie. . . those pesky details. . .
 
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