I know I avoid uncomfortable things. Which for me is everything, and everyone. It's strange and frightening to know you are in a nose dive, but the thought of getting help brings me such terror for some reason. I feel the same way about going to the doctor. Hell, I even feel that way about going to the grocery store. I don't really know what to do about it. I know my PTSD is really bad, but how does one get help when help is terrifying? Not just fear, but paralyzing terror.