Hi, I'll go by Fox or Rye, doesn't matter much.
When I was a teen, I was sexually harassed by my younger cousin, which I told my mum about. She told me it was nothing. He sexually assaulted me over the holidays. This only happened once, technically, since I think everything else goes under harassment. I don't know if this counts as COCSA for that reason, but I will be starting therapy next week. I am now in my 20s. I've never really heard of anyone with my experiences tbh as it seems so little compared to anyone else's.
I had a fear of children, specifically ones that looked like him, for a long time. I still kinda do, but I worked in fast food for a bit so it isn't as bad now really. I did get triggered at work when a kid assaulted me there too (I don't think the kid knew what reality was so I just accepted the mum's apology and let it go). My dad has a kid that looks like he did though, which makes life hard. I feel like throwing up whenever I think of him. I think I've had flashbacks, I've had many nightmares (mostly about my parents and step parent for some reason?), and I still can't trust anyone deeply.
I do have a lot of experiences from my childhood as well but I think those are technically just classed as normal, if just a bit of bad luck. It affected me all the same. A heaping pile of parental alienation on both sides. My dad got into a big car accident (not his fault). My mum said he didn't love me and told me to ask him for money all the time. He probably abused my mum when I was a baby, before he left, so that's complicated to know as a child. Bullied. Someone threatened to jump out of a window and blame me for their injuries, once.
I hope one day I'm not afraid to sleep. Or be close to anyone. Or trust anyone. Or live through the holidays. I still live near him, but I can't afford to move right now, don't know if I ever could. I only get 10 therapy sessions for my sexual trauma so I'll have to hope it's enough to deal with life, at least.
Anyway, it might be nice to meet people. I am scared my story is too insignificant to talk to others with kinda similar experiences but at least I can tell my soon-to-be therapist I tried to talk in a forum, even if it's just the one time.
When I was a teen, I was sexually harassed by my younger cousin, which I told my mum about. She told me it was nothing. He sexually assaulted me over the holidays. This only happened once, technically, since I think everything else goes under harassment. I don't know if this counts as COCSA for that reason, but I will be starting therapy next week. I am now in my 20s. I've never really heard of anyone with my experiences tbh as it seems so little compared to anyone else's.
I had a fear of children, specifically ones that looked like him, for a long time. I still kinda do, but I worked in fast food for a bit so it isn't as bad now really. I did get triggered at work when a kid assaulted me there too (I don't think the kid knew what reality was so I just accepted the mum's apology and let it go). My dad has a kid that looks like he did though, which makes life hard. I feel like throwing up whenever I think of him. I think I've had flashbacks, I've had many nightmares (mostly about my parents and step parent for some reason?), and I still can't trust anyone deeply.
I do have a lot of experiences from my childhood as well but I think those are technically just classed as normal, if just a bit of bad luck. It affected me all the same. A heaping pile of parental alienation on both sides. My dad got into a big car accident (not his fault). My mum said he didn't love me and told me to ask him for money all the time. He probably abused my mum when I was a baby, before he left, so that's complicated to know as a child. Bullied. Someone threatened to jump out of a window and blame me for their injuries, once.
I hope one day I'm not afraid to sleep. Or be close to anyone. Or trust anyone. Or live through the holidays. I still live near him, but I can't afford to move right now, don't know if I ever could. I only get 10 therapy sessions for my sexual trauma so I'll have to hope it's enough to deal with life, at least.
Anyway, it might be nice to meet people. I am scared my story is too insignificant to talk to others with kinda similar experiences but at least I can tell my soon-to-be therapist I tried to talk in a forum, even if it's just the one time.