pamcoco
Sponsor
My last few years, I intentionally, perhaps not wisely, have cared for each of my divorced parents, my Mom with Lewy Body and my Dad with Parkinsons and cancer.
As much as I have tried to murder it, I can’t watch people I care about suffer. This position of closeness with my parents has caused my sociopath siblings to target me and has led to an extravagant smear campaign. Bad is now horrible as quite a bit of money is on the line.
I asked my parents in return for the sacrifice of caregiving (it’s really hard) that they protect me through truth and transparency with family members. Of course they agreed.
So is my crazy. How could I ever expect people that have barely protected me as a young child to be capable of caring for me now?
Tonight I flee to my house a state away as the BLOWTORCH, more accurately than gaslight, has shredded my last thread of dignity.
I am frightened by how much I loathe and fear people. I don’t think I will ever get better, which starts with building some solid foundations for relationships. I really only have one friend remaining and she lives far away. In my town I don’t know anyone and am not positive I want to.
I don’t think I am capable of choosing good people and caring for myself in their presence.
As much as I have tried to murder it, I can’t watch people I care about suffer. This position of closeness with my parents has caused my sociopath siblings to target me and has led to an extravagant smear campaign. Bad is now horrible as quite a bit of money is on the line.
I asked my parents in return for the sacrifice of caregiving (it’s really hard) that they protect me through truth and transparency with family members. Of course they agreed.
So is my crazy. How could I ever expect people that have barely protected me as a young child to be capable of caring for me now?
Tonight I flee to my house a state away as the BLOWTORCH, more accurately than gaslight, has shredded my last thread of dignity.
I am frightened by how much I loathe and fear people. I don’t think I will ever get better, which starts with building some solid foundations for relationships. I really only have one friend remaining and she lives far away. In my town I don’t know anyone and am not positive I want to.
I don’t think I am capable of choosing good people and caring for myself in their presence.