JustAguy13
New Here
I'm not military and don't want to take anything away or compare myself with military related PTSD sufferers. To tell the truth I can't believe where I am at. I was diagnosed PTSD in 21 due to narcissistic abuse by a very powerful person at my place of employment. My Doctors feel he has narcissistic personality disorder. The abuse started in 2020, I sucked it up, toughed it out for 2.5 years and finally that chapter was closed. The problem is once the abuse was finally cut off I began to see the toll it had taken on my family I couldn't see it before, I felt like I was just hanging by a thread, but before I could take action on that my spouse, son and daughter in law rejected me and don't believe in PTSD, I can't see my grandkids. I have tried to educate but say they just don't want to hear it. I drank heavily at night to quell the fight or flight, intrusive thoughts, and hyper vigilance just to go to sleep. I want to make amends but they are focused on the person I was under the influence of full on PTSD. When I was young I felt much like they did about anxiety and PTSD, oh the irony. My priority has always been my spouse and family, that is why I fought for 2.5 years, we needed the income and the insurance. I feel like the reward I got for fighting the good fight was another punch in the gut, never can remember being this low. I feel guilty for thinking it but have begun to wonder if the only reasonable way forward for me is to move on and re-prioritize, I don't know. Sorry to be such a downer but any positive input would be nice.