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How do you start a business with crippling depression and anxiety?

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Lately I feel I'm sinking deeper with every step.
Yet there are 2 choice- end everything, or resolve it. The only way to resolve it is to make extra income to allow me to pay my bills while I search for a better paid job, and while I get therapy. Got no loans, scholarships or other options. Need to have an online store to make some income. Need to be able to make stuff for that store however I feel. To be able to promote it, even on days when I want to SH. To make a change in my life no matter my mental health- so I can AFFORD to get help.
As of currently, I have to- give up, or do something that feels impossible in the context of my life the last weeks.
How do I make it possible?

I used to have 3 other jobs I pulled out of no where: selling earrings online(no supplies anymore), cleaning (did random ad) but I screwed my back, and drawings for mini income. Haven't drawn in months because of how I felt, and then too much work. But now I'm very unstable BUT I need to start making more. And it seems so huge- starting a store. Like I don't deserve it. Like I've lost the skills for it. Like if I were one of those lucky people that get credit cards with 1000$ limit to begin with I'd feel like a millionaire. I would if I got even a 100$... I'm so close to giving up that the amount of faith needed for doing any side gig let alone a store seems impossible and improbable. How do I take action? How do I have faith? How do I stop sinking?
 
Like if I were one of those lucky people that get credit cards with 1000$ limit to begin with I'd feel like a millionaire.

luck has nothing to do with this accomplishment. that is simple perseverance, as is the challenge of living with crippling depression and anxiety, whether self-employed, on welfare or working a time clock gig.

if i just keep putting one foot in front of the other, i am bound to get somewhere. ~tom joad (grapes of wrath)
 
How do I take action?
Wondering if you have (or if you've looked to see if there is) a small business association in your area? Oftentimes, they provide help for free, and just beingable to have some support helps you not feel so overwhelmed. I opened two businesses within the last two years and was able to find someone who did free business consulting. It made a world of difference. She is a private tax preparer who does free consulting on the side.

It took me awhile to be able to even find someone. I had a lot of "there is no point," "I'm not good," etc...kind of feelings.

One thing that helps me is to make lists of what I need to do and work through them one at a time.

Sorry you are feeling so bad. I understand.
 
I started a biz two years ago and still don't know how I'm doing it some days. When I feel I've lost interest and can't make myself do the things, I take it as a signal to megastack self care. Am I eating right? Stop and meal plan. Am I tired? Set reminders to go to bed early, and try to get up at the same time every morning. Bedtime yoga + meditations. Still sad? Make a loooong list of things I enjoy that are attainable, e.g. baths, music, books, riding the train, walking in the rain, etc. Do as many as i want. I take the focus completely off the business. When I'm reminded how much I like it again, I start with a very small task. At some point I make a list of small/med/hard tasks. I try to do a little every day. I'm sorry you are dealing with so much pain. Please be gentle with yourself 💛 you are capable and worthy! Sending warm support.
 
Lately I feel I'm sinking deeper with every step.
Yet there are 2 choice- end everything, or resolve it. The only way to resolve it is to make extra income to allow me to pay my bills while I search for a better paid job, and while I get therapy. Got no loans, scholarships or other options. Need to have an online store to make some income. Need to be able to make stuff for that store however I feel. To be able to promote it, even on days when I want to SH. To make a change in my life no matter my mental health- so I can AFFORD to get help.
As of currently, I have to- give up, or do something that feels impossible in the context of my life the last weeks.
How do I make it possible?

I used to have 3 other jobs I pulled out of no where: selling earrings online(no supplies anymore), cleaning (did random ad) but I screwed my back, and drawings for mini income. Haven't drawn in months because of how I felt, and then too much work. But now I'm very unstable BUT I need to start making more. And it seems so huge- starting a store. Like I don't deserve it. Like I've lost the skills for it. Like if I were one of those lucky people that get credit cards with 1000$ limit to begin with I'd feel like a millionaire. I would if I got even a 100$... I'm so close to giving up that the amount of faith needed for doing any side gig let alone a store seems impossible and improbable. How do I take action? How do I have faith? How do I stop sinking?
Been there, you just do your best. Frequent breaks, find what motivates you. Work for 5 minutes at a time. What's the most important thing to get done? reward yourself for doing even a little bit of work.
 
Thank you all for the valuable advice. I actually can't really start a real business (barely surviving), but will start with blog and an Etsy shop.
Had it all planned out, but I've been too scared to start. Sadly recent events didn't make starting easier/better but rather the opposite.

But the fact is, I need something on the side, especially when I'm in this state.
It's just really hard starting- even brainstorming tasks in this state. But I'm doing something new today, trying to accept my reality and adapt to it. Which means accepting that some of what I do work wise may not be done in optimal state of mind and may not be my most perfect work. But that I have to start anyway. At least I'm trying to tell myself this because I need a reason to keep going.
 
I started a biz two years ago and still don't know how I'm doing it some days. When I feel I've lost interest and can't make myself do the things, I take it as a signal to megastack self care. Am I eating right? Stop and meal plan. Am I tired? Set reminders to go to bed early, and try to get up at the same time every morning. Bedtime yoga + meditations. Still sad? Make a loooong list of things I enjoy that are attainable, e.g. baths, music, books, riding the train, walking in the rain, etc. Do as many as i want. I take the focus completely off the business. When I'm reminded how much I like it again, I start with a very small task. At some point I make a list of small/med/hard tasks. I try to do a little every day. I'm sorry you are dealing with so much pain. Please be gentle with yourself 💛 you are capable and worthy! Sending warm support.
I feel I've not done either of those for a while (eat well, sleep well, meditate etc) and I have been quite mean to myself, so yes, that maybe a good time for a bit of health reset. Within the bounds of not buying anything new or going to anyone but using the resources I have. I need all of those and more. Also took me a moment to get that I've gotten in a state where it's not the time to learn cooking new things, because I'm really not okay right now. And my productivity is non-existent. So I have to preserve my energy and do easy things like eggs and salads and instant soups and just forgive myself- until I have energy for making one better meal. And then maybe 2 etc. I just reaaaally need to start forgiving myself for going through this now and having to work on my health while I work on my finances, that both are improtant and that PTSD is no joke or anything to push down. That taking care of myself is okay too.
 
I feel I've not done either of those for a while (eat well, sleep well, meditate etc) and I have been quite mean to myself, so yes, that maybe a good time for a bit of health reset. Within the bounds of not buying anything new or going to anyone but using the resources I have. I need all of those and more. Also took me a moment to get that I've gotten in a state where it's not the time to learn cooking new things, because I'm really not okay right now. And my productivity is non-existent. So I have to preserve my energy and do easy things like eggs and salads and instant soups and just forgive myself- until I have energy for making one better meal. And then maybe 2 etc. I just reaaaally need to start forgiving myself for going through this now and having to work on my health while I work on my finances, that both are improtant and that PTSD is no joke or anything to push down. That taking care of myself is okay too.
Self forgiveness and self gentleness are ongoing. We as survivors go through so much learning and reprocessing it can be dizzying. There is also space for new self acceptance, but the format varies.

* Gentle support as you find your way.*
 
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