• 💖 [Donate To Keep MyPTSD Online] 💖 Every contribution, no matter how small, fuels our mission and helps us continue to provide peer-to-peer services. Your generosity keeps us independent and available freely to the world. MyPTSD closes if we can't reach our annual goal.

Relationship Having lunch with partner that pulled away months ago

southwest

Learning
So I've posted about my partner being trigger around me and ending our relationship a few months ago. From that point we have very lightly kept in contact over the months. She had asked me to keep inviting her to things that we both enjoyed and I did however she never actually came to them.

We ate supposed to grab lunch with each other this week. I miss her and still love her. I want to continue our relationship but I don't know how to approach this and not put alot of pressure on her.
 
I want to continue our relationship but I don't know how to approach this and not put alot of pressure on her.

in the awkward waltz my hubby and i have danced for the past 44 years, the step which helped most with my own healing journey is, "the i don't know" step. that is where we both let it be okay that neither of us know how to approach this and not put alot of pressure on the other. i, equally, don't want to put savior-league pressures on him. healing is an inside job, babycakes. not even you can do it for me. when we let it be okay that we don't know, we have much more room for creative improv. all you need is love. knowledge is highly over-rated in matters of the heart. the heart goes where it goes.

but that is me and the best relationships are thoroughly customized.

steadying support while explore your own options. bon appetite.
 
Since this is the very first time she’s coming along to something? I would personally just enjoy it. Rather than asking her for more.

It’s one reason I don’t see certain friends for a year or more after I start seeing other friends. They can’t help themselves. I know the MOMENT I agree to one thing with them? They want everything. And will be deeply unhappy unless they get it. So I have to wait to see them, until I’m 100% on my A game, and can commit to everything.
 
Since this is the very first time she’s coming along to something? I would personally just enjoy it. Rather than asking her for more.

It’s one reason I don’t see certain friends for a year or more after I start seeing other friends. They can’t help themselves. I know the MOMENT I agree to one thing with them? They want everything. And will be deeply unhappy unless they get it. So I have to wait to see them, until I’m 100% on my A game, and can commit to everything.
Thank you for the reply. I'll keep it light and fun. I do want it to become more than just friends ago though, but I am in no rush to push that on her.
 
Back
Top