Search results

  1. M

    The Thought That Started The Feeling

    it is different for everyone, just find the thought, you will see it is deeply rooted in something old and not about the "here and now".
  2. M

    The Thought That Started The Feeling

    Thanks everyone! Really it is helping me push away those suicidal feelings now. Today was a pretty rough session, talked a lot about what happened to me when I was 9. I haven't talked about it in that way, it was interesting. I did well and I am proud of myself for sticking with it even...
  3. M

    My Therapist Suggested Inpatient Treatment

    I have been inpatient twice now and really it is there to give you a break, you don't have to deal with anything, you go to group, you eat, you sleep and you are safe, plain and simple. I got out and went right back to work...huge, huge, huge mistake! I ended up getting completely overwhelmed...
  4. M

    The Thought That Started The Feeling

    I was talking to my T this week about my suicidal thinking, being that even when things are going well I can have it, fact is most everyday I wake up feeling suicidal to some degree. Anyway, she asked me about the feelings I have and I just wasn't getting it, couldn't pinpoint anything beyond...
  5. M

    How Do You Overcome The Impulses?

    what helps me is to know that feelings do change, I might feel suicidal but those feelings do change, I might feel happy or sad, glad or mad....ALL feelings change. Just gotta wait it out.
  6. M

    Got A New Job

    I am in my second week of my new job after 5 months of not working. I love my new job, it is challenging, forward thinking and a step ahead of where I was. Oh and I am finally making some serious bank. good to get paid again.
  7. M


    oh that is too bad, I know my triggers when it comes to TV and I can usually spot a triggering program. Netflix is better than TV, I really like being able to watch movies on my computer and plug in my headphones, it lets me escape.
  8. M

    No Suicide And No Self Harm Contracts

    just proves that open and honest communication is the only way to go.
  9. M


    Great, so now I am hooked on Nip/Tuck, this show is hilarious and sick at the same time. Also, I can't wait until Weeds comes back I am totally in love with that show.
  10. M

    Re-Reading Journal To Desensitize May Not Be Right Timing

    I am re-reading mine right now too, part of going over it again is being able to fill in the holes, I can add something just about everytime I go over it. It will get worse before it gets better, Anthony has some great tips on getting through.
  11. M

    You Know You Have PTSD When...

    when you "wake up" 100 miles from home sitting in your car on the side of the road with the Rolling stone's blaring on the radio and a strange dog in the back seat.
  12. M

    How To Fake Ptsd - Something Scary

    that is freakin' nuts! Why would anyone wanna fake it, like it is a fun thing.
  13. M

    Getting The Courage To Start A Diary

    It is extremely hard to start a diary and hard to re-read it as well. It felt good to get it out the first time and I wanted to just keep moving forward, it is tough to do but in the long run it is a tremendous help. You will never be ready to share your trauma's and there is no good time just...
  14. M

    I Wake Up With Death On My Mind

    Yes, but that is a clear sign that you are depressed, meds help that go away.
  15. M

    Not Making Plans But ...

    I don't like the hospital either but would you rather check yourself in voluntarily or OD on meds, spend 2 days in ICU and five days in the psych. ward on a hold like I did? I think the better choice is to check yourself in, take a rest from the outside stressors and get your shit together...
  16. M

    Is This Strange Or Do Others Think This Way Too?

    I have always had those feelings as well, I don't really think about the future because I don't think I will be there. I believe the therapist term for this is future telling and catastrophizing. Common for victims of trauma
  17. M

    I Tried Cutting Today

    cutting is a very bad coping skill focus on some good coping skills. Therapists don't generally freak out about cutting because it is not a precursor to suicide. try holding an ice cube in your hand instead it is hard and hurts but isn't painful or shameful like cutting. Or use good coping...
  18. M

    I Wont Say It To My T As I Know The Consequences

    I just did a contract with my T, it had like 5 things on it but one was about suicide and that if she feels that I am unsafe and will harm myself that I will check myself into the hospital instead of her calling the cops on me because she doesn't want to do that. We both acknowledged that if I...
  19. M

    Roman, 37 years, victims of incest by two men in my family and physically abused by one of my brothe

    Hi Roman, nice to have you here and sad to hear your story, families are not good at all sometimes.
  20. M

    CPTSD And Bulimia?

    follow your instincts and talk about it when you are ready, no one is going to force you to do anything. It is always about control isn't it, sucks! I am trying really hard to eat the right things and not eat too much. These new meds I am on are helping, the Prozac helps with OCD and has been...
  21. M

    No-Suicide Contracts

    i agree, a contract isn't a bad thing. I made a verbal contract (promise) to my husband and it kept me safe on more than one occasion.
  22. M

    CPTSD And Bulimia?

    it is obviously a bad coping mechanism so I would talk about it with your T if you feel like you are ready to make a change to using healthy coping skills. I was binge eating and gaining weight and it was obvious. I too have felt ashamed of this but have been working on it by myself. I just...
  23. M

    I Am So Sad

    because he is a bad person and he is broken. I too grew up being abused and it is hard to not believe it is all my fault or all about me. It isn't though, they are the ****ed up ones. Be upset, greive, beat the shit out of him in your head, change it, when he is beating you turn around and...
  24. M

    My World Is Dying And I Am A Livid Floridian

    it is taking way too long, i too was born and raise a FL girl on the Atlantic side. It is a shame, so many beautiful animals, water, beaches and the lifestyles it is going to ruin. They don't make beaches and oceanfront anymore. Honestly from the food perspective a majority of our seafood is...
  25. M

    Minneapolis/St Paul, Minnesota

    a PTSD support group?