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((((((((((Thin Lizzy)))) Move away from criticism, the more criticism guides your work the more you lose the inherent beauty in it.. that's what I believe at least.. I used to over-analyze everything when i was a student (and in turn be far too self critical) and letting go of that after...

Incendiu that is f**king awesome! LOVE DREAMS! Here is my latest - it's an original drawing exhibited as 5 A4 pages extended across 5 frames parts of it were cut-off through the whole scanning process so it looks a little disjointed.

I am thankful for myself and for the future and for being able to just 'be' without feeling as though I'm drowning myself and above all I am thankful for the grand phantasmagorical cosmos in all its splendor.

I feel like all I want is to be in a permanent warm bath.. minus the prune skin.

Also the fact that I am a master procrastinator is angering me.

I spent almost all day paroozing human rights sites online (while at work.. it was a slow day) the lack there of such rights in SO MANY parts of the world made me angry today.. or sad.. or annoyed or just beyond all of it because it is impossible to even comprehend.

I slept wonderfully.. but I went to sleep listening to holotropic breathwork music and had this dream.. where I was at my old primary school that was all empty, no one in sight. I was in the toilets and I began to play an organ (not ever having known how to play one) I played an epic tune...

I wouldn't say it is necessarily a weird trigger but I find when I am hungry and feel like I am being controlled in some way.. I get really angry violent thoughts/feelings overtake me. I had an instance of this the other day at work but I did well at calming myself down - POWER ON!

So I started P/T Uni 2 weeks ago and am really enjoying the ability to get all up in it again, especially printmaking. This is an image I am going to convert next week into a woodcut using a laser cutting machine- Woop de doo!!. Also I have more stuff on mah blog...

Went to sleep around 3 (damn noisy housemates!) and slept through to 8. Could have gone for more but "meh".. I had a night full of dreams, they were not really nightmares as I did not find them scary although the subjects themselves were terrifying. But I cannot recall what they were now.. RAWR...

Hey wish I could help you.. There are lots of methods out there to try and lull one into a sleep, I think it's just about finding what works best for you. Addy suggested meditation which is a good one. Also dim lights, relaxing music, a glass of warm sweetened milk or tea etc (This site has some...

Aw it's so nice to walk along the sea :) Last night I dreamed of my 2 uncles being with me and I was unwell (ED wise). Of Japanese children jumping from skyscrapers that were falling apart. Of a fast steam train that was a high school students (Seth Rogen's) media project - careering through...

I feel sad.. the past few days of constant intense waves of realizations were amazing but I fear I still don't know how to cope with my own life, with other people, with the past, with my body. I miss what I was.. I do not feel comfortable with what I am now. But I also feel very optimistic that...

Not last night but the night before I dreamed of a behavioral machine, I cannot remember specifics but whoever was hooked up to the machine would have memories and predictions of behaviors appear before them as a kind of projection I think. Slept 3 hours that night.. last night I slept about 8.

Oh man! I totally get this with my T.. but I haven't bought it up though I know it is normal.. I don't know whether I have it in me to tell her. She's about the same age as my mother too.

I am struggling with the same thing.. but instead of my mother's trauma being the Spanish civil war it was child sexual abuse that drove her insane and led to her abuse and neglect of me. freakofnurture put it really well think.. in terms of separating understanding and compassion from...

Wow.. is all I can say. I have been seeing my psych over a year now and I can only rehash what Kim has said.. Only once did I really have somewhat of a run in with her (I think she was having an off day though.. she is human after all) T: I cannot gauge how you're actually feeling about this...

To complete these 2 university units that I have enrolled in.. (Hopefully with outstanding marks.. but not beat myself up if I don't meet my expectations) And to at least complete the verbal presentation (hyperventilate). To be in at least one other exhibition before the years end. To maintain...

Today has been a roller coaster of feelings. I was stuck in my own thoughts for a large percentage of today but I managed to escape for awhile this evening with some friends albeit a brief encounter. Right now I feel kind of sad..kind of alone.. kind of confused... kind of scared. Muscle tension...

I always sleep well these days- 6 hours +. Nightmares and sleep problems used to haunt me incessantly since I was a child but for some reason that stopped a few years ago. I really empathize with everyone that is struggling with sleep problems.. they SUCK! I know I still have nightmares and...

Awesome Goingonhope! I had a good day, and I have been doing so well over the past month- ED wise. But tonight I had a shower and saw my stupid body and I'm trying so hard to push the negative thoughts out of my head SO HARD! But i feel like no matter what I do I'm just going to keep expanding...

I dreamed that my housemate was seeing the same therapist as I.. and I felt.. jealous.. or angry ??? And my other housemate accidentally released noxious gasses into the sky that formed an aurora bourealis looking display (the gasses were to be the main visual spectacle for an event he was...

Shaky.. I don't know whether it's because of the cold or because of recall. Scattered, I feel kinda of scattered.

((((((((((((((((((((((((AngelaMarie)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

I feel so alone and horrible. Earlier my housemate's girlfriend walked into my room while I was crying (no one ever sees me cry) She just stood there with her eye brows lifted and said "Uh.. I'll come back later".. never did. Our house was full of people but I felt like they were all ignoring...