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    I just need someone to care.

    No one can just sit with me in these feelings except my therapist. I already see her twice a week but I feel so alone in between. Even my partner just gets really overwhelmed hearing about my abuse. My life, my memories, they make people uncomfortable. I just want someone who listens without...
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    Need support, maybe starting meds

    So I've been battling depression for a long time, but I've never taken any meds. Im been in trauma therapy, and its helping, but I'm still really struggling. My primary doctor was concerned about my depression scores and had me see a Psychiatrist. I've always been really, really skeptical about...
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    I just need a mom.

    I hate myself so much and I just want to call my adoptive mom. I want her to hold me and tell me it is going to be okay. But I cant. I just wish someone loved me when I needed it.
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    Death 8 years ago today

    My dad committed suicide 8 years ago. It sounds like a long time but it feels like yesterday. I was 16. I honestly just feel even more numb about it as the years go on. Is it the pain fading with time? Or am I just cold for not feeling anything? I can feel him fading from my memory. I wish I...
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    Asking for what I need - maybe EMDR?

    So I haven't had great experiences with therapy. I always feel like I'm doing all the work and the therapist just sits there or nods or agrees. I should just talk to a wall for free instead. My current therapist I've only seen 4 times so far, but she just kinda repeats everything I say. I know...
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    What is the point?

    I hate slogging through every single freaking day. I didnt choose to exist. I didnt choose to have all this shit happen to me. Why do I have to stay alive day in and day out? Why do I have to put all this work in to be a normal person? It's not like I'm enjoying it. I just dont want to do it...
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    Cant use the word "abuse"

    I want to claim the word abuse, like maybe it would be freeing somehow. But i cant justify myself using it. I just cant. I feel guilty and wrong, so many people had it so much worse. CPS came and took some of you away because it was obviously bad. But no one came for me, so it couldn't have been...
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    Survivors Guilt

    A letter to my sister, my mother, and my brother: Do you still love me even though I didnt go through what you did? I know you think my life has been nothing but sunshine and roses compared to what you went through, but it wasnt. Am I not allowed to have feelings? You expect me to just be happy...
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    I am No One

    Sometimes I seek out confirmation that I'm not alone, that I'm not the only one out there with terrible stories to tell. But most days that's not really what I want. Most days I want people to be shocked and disturbed by what happened to me. I want them to think it was extreme, severe...
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    Does anyone read memiors?

    I was wondering if anyone out there tends to read books about other peoples trauma (such as memiors). I find a lot of them comforting. Then I know someone out there not only made it through it, but are also openly talking about their experiences and I feel like that's super important. On the...
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    Sufferer New year, new here

    Hello, I'm new here. I've never joined any kind of online support community, mostly out of fear. I was afraid of someone I know figuring out who I am by my posts. But the more I've poked around this site the more I'm realizing that 1. That's unlikely 2. I have the freedom and safety at this time...