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  1. RubyBlue

    Can empathy be taught?

    I’m just mulling over the why’s of why some people do things to hurt others. I know some of it is re-enacting/reacting to childhood trauma/stressors/gaining control over lives and others. I know some can be related to some sort of mental illness. But another why I’ve heard is the person just...
  2. RubyBlue

    Exercise while on Prazosin

    I just started prazosin a couple of weeks ago (or a week? Days are running together). Anyway, it makes me extremely dizzy and lightheaded. It works for the nightmares wonderfully, and my pdoc warned me of the side effects since it’s technically a blood pressure med. But I need to get back in...
  3. RubyBlue

    Meet Cute - Tell me the story of how you met your significant other.

    Tell me the story of how you met your significant other. I need some hope that eventually I’ll have someone somehow.
  4. RubyBlue

    What’s the point in therapy?

    Really. I know I’m usually one of the first to ask people if they are in therapy when they post here struggling. But honestly? I’m not feeling it anymore. I mean, I’d rather not pay so much money to be worthless when I can get that for free from others. Like why would I continue to pay and chase...
  5. RubyBlue

    Setting Boundaries with Relatives

    So I have a former sister in law that we’ve kinda gotten close, still rocky sometimes. I’m pretty much the only one she talks to or confides in which I’ve tried helping her to meet others so it’s not all on me but she has no interest. I feel she is deeply depressed and should honestly seek...
  6. RubyBlue

    Firework Anxiety

    The sound doesn’t bother me so much, though I know it does a lot of others for good reason. But I live in a rural area filled to the brim with dry grass fields, no current burn ban, and a toooon of drunk people who have no idea how not to be reckless. Every year we get fires, and every year I’m...
  7. RubyBlue

    CASA Volunteerism

    So I have a permanent schedule at work now which enables me to add volunteering to my life. One area I will certainly volunteer is at the animal shelter. Another one that I have really wanted to get involved in is CASA where I can be an advocate for children in abusive situations. But this...
  8. RubyBlue

    News Fort Hood - 2 Soldiers Missing/Found Dead

    I know the (US) military has never been pristine in their dealings. You can see so many examples of MST and such just around this forum let alone elsewhere. That does not diminish the fact that I have the utmost respect for those who choose to enlist. But this Fort Hood scandal(?) (too light...
  9. RubyBlue

    Freezing your eggs

    Has anyone frozen their eggs for later on? I’m in this constant pressure in my mind that there is an internal clock at work and I’m running out of time. I’m terrified I am going to wait too long, I have no problem with adoption (I want to do it as well) but I also want something in my life to...
  10. RubyBlue

    Transition to Vegetarianism

    I’m just curious about any tips and tricks anyone has about how to deal with craving meat and making sure to still get lots of protein. I don’t have the self control to go all the way vegan but maybe one day. I am a pretty light meat eater anyway and find alternatives most of the time. A big...
  11. RubyBlue

    Views on boycotting - Can you admire the work of someone who did something bad? Can you separate personal from business?

    I would like to know peoples views on cancel culture/boycotting/etc when a company (or person) does not adhere to your beliefs. There have been a lot of examples over the years of course, and right now that’s happening with the BLM movement. If a company does not put out a statement, they face...
  12. RubyBlue

    Inner Kid Work

    So I’m torn, my T is working with my traumas but is usually very present/future focused. But I’ve seen a ton of people on here doing inner kid work. My T isn’t experienced in that and no I have no interest in changing to a different T. But I do recognize I have a lot of torn feelings/reactions...
  13. RubyBlue

    Hypersexuality vs Loneliness

    I think I’m losing sight of the difference. Or I’m fighting both. Or my brain is just that screwed up. Background: CSA for years starting from a very young age. This CSA was twisted and morphed into what I knew to be “love”. A person that touches you clearly loves you that much to risk their...
  14. RubyBlue

    How Do I Get Involved In Local Politics?

    Has anyone gotten involved in their local politics in the US? How did you go about doing it? Do you feel like your involvement is actually useful? Or just a way for higher ups to be like ya we let residents take part. Can you get involved in nearby city stuff if you technically live outside...
  15. RubyBlue

    Question Regarding Hospitalizations

    For those in the US- if you don’t have insurance (or cash) can you be voluntarily hospitalized? From what I understand, unless you have insurance or cash, you can’t go to a hospital at all unless it’s the emergency room. And I’m afraid if I go to an ER I won’t be taken seriously because I’m not...
  16. RubyBlue

    Adult vs. Child

    I've not been around here long but I've noticed in my time here that people view the parent that only witnessed abuse differently depending on whether the child or absent parent is the one posting. It seems like quite a drastically different way of viewing things often by the same members. I'm...
  17. RubyBlue

    Social Media Boundaries

    99% sure I’m addicted to having the constant influx of information because I keep clicking. I can tell myself to back off for just 15 small minutes and yet there I am on Facebook seeking out the drama. Maybe replying, maybe not, but it’s.so.exhausting. And I can’t seem to stop. I need help...
  18. RubyBlue

    Favorite Aggressive Exercises

    I have so much pent up anxiety, frustration, anger, the works and it’s gotta come out. I would love to do something like MMA/jiu jitsu/kickboxing but I don’t have the money for membership fees at the moment. I’m considering finding a cheap punching bag but I don’t know much about them. I would...
  19. RubyBlue

    Responsible for the World

    Otherwise known as codependency on steroids. I feel this deep sense of needing to “fix” all of the things wrong. I know this has got to be related to the fact that I was always the fixer growing up and even now. I’m the one who settles fights, gives advice, is almost entirely depended on to...
  20. RubyBlue

    How much therapy is *too much*?

    I’ve noticed there are a lot of people who go for multiple times a week for years on end and as nice as that can sound, doesn’t it hinder things? I mean the point of therapy is of course trauma healing, but to also be able to cope with life and triggers on your own right? I can see it being...
  21. RubyBlue

    Getting over jealousy

    Today has been hard. I’ve been “missing” a total of 4 time in my life. I only remember 2 of those though. Both of those times people essentially shrugged. It was just me after all, no ones worried about that. I have had two younger family members go missing as well. One of them today. Both...
  22. RubyBlue

    Sexual Assault Employer getting touchy, afraid to go back

    New to this site, and not sure I'm posting in the right area. I just started a new job on Wednesday. I like it but my trainer (a much older guy than me) kept coming behind me and touching my arm and my back. I didn't know what to do so I just ignored it, but I'm scared to go back now. For some...
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