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    Mum is stuck due to past trauma and now I am staying with her

    I am determined to find my own place, so not afraid of getting stuck living with her but I think it's more a fear of being like her and as she has been single for 31 years and I am recently single even though it is irrational and I know our situations are completely different I feel a sense of...
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    Mum is stuck due to past trauma and now I am staying with her

    Thank you @Invisible Fire I am in therapy. I was with a therapist for two and a half years and worked on assertiveness and putting boundaries in place with my dad, it also helped with my relationship too. I have just started with this new therapist about a month ago and it feels realistic for me...
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    Mum is stuck due to past trauma and now I am staying with her

    My birthday is coming up soon and my mother started to tell me the story about when I was born, what it was like when her waters broke, when my dad took her to the hospital etc and how my grandma was the first person to hold me etc. It's a story I have heard before but this time she went into...
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    What do you need emotionally right now, and why?

    I need to move my body by exercising, something I don't do often enough lately apart from walking. I have an exercise bike and haven't used it in months. Today I'm going to listen to an upbeat playlist and use the bike. Cycle and keep cycling until I feel connected with myself again so that I...
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    Trauma and isolation

    @airdog I can relate to this absolutely and I have learnt to filter myself when speaking to certain people - this is a double edged sword in a way because speaking up and expressing how I feel is so important after feeling silenced for years about the trauma, finding my voice was a big part of...
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    Anticipating lockdowns and mental health symptom spikes

    @Justmehere you sound like you are a people person and thrive on the connections you have with others which is such a great thing, particularly with PTSD and the feelings of disconnection and dissociation that can come with it. Making those connections no doubt make you feel alive and I can...
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    How long have you been struggling / diagnosed with PTSD and what help have you gotten?

    Diagnosed 7 years ago. When first diagnosed, had CBT for a few weeks and was on SSRI medication for 4 years. Have had long term therapy for the past three years and doing much much better. Have been in a long term relationship for 4 years and life has been so much more settled. I do still...
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    Sufferer Complex PTSD following spousal abuse

    Welcome Pythia ☺️ first of all thank you for sharing, I can imagine it would not have been easy typing that and reliving those memories. I understand your inability to talk sometimes but want to say your post was very clear and you described your situation so well that I am sure many of us...
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    Sufferer PTSD since 1997 - Sexual Abuse, Suicide Attempt, Psychological Abuse, Bullying, Verbal Abuse, Rape, Homophobia

    Welcome Leeshee ☺️ Thank you for sharing, I know that can't have been easy and I am sure there are many people here who have had similar experiences. I am sorry that you have had these experiences and have endured complex trauma. You achieved a lot despite everything, went to college, had a good...
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    why do i do this?

    This used to happen frequently just after after the trauma had happened and for the first couple of years I couldn’t string a written sentence together. I was studying and struggled to write essays when this had never been an issue for me prior to the trauma. It was really frustrating and I...
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    dissociation as a defense mechanism

    Sounds like your survival instinct kicking in and you do what you need to do when you visit your parents. If you feel it works for you and helps you to get through your visits then fair enough, maybe it acts as boundary between you and them to keep yourself safe emotionally. I do agree with what...
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    Feeling Disconnected from everyone

    I hope you are feeling better, sounds like the change of meds has helped. Can totally relate to the glass wall feeling and feeling disconnected. Grounding techniques and things that you may have done in the past that made you feel alive and connected - be it listening to a certain type of music...
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    when I develop feelings trauma resurges

    Strangelongtrip, it sounds like a lot is going on for you at the moment and with the anniversary of your previous relationship ending it seems like that experience would have been occupying some of your headspace which would have been very distracting especially when you have met someone new...
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    Both of us have this.

    My boyfriend (well he is an ex now as of a month ago) has Aspergers and the communication issues and his inability to see things from other people's points of view was really the reason I decided to end the relationship after 4 years. Despite his slower processing of emotions, he was brilliant...
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    I met the right guy at the wrong time now he has reconnected do I tell him about the trauma

    Thank you so much for your support and comments. I reconnected with him last weekend and we talked for two and a half hours about the whole thing. Can't believe we spoke for so long but there was a lot to catch up on. He was really pleased to hear from me. He said I had hurt him back then and it...
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    I Feel Like I Am in the "Trauma Olympics" With My New Friend

    Wow, that sounds difficult to deal with. It sounds like she hasn't processed her trauma properly and overshares with people because of it. Also that it has become her identity. Maybe research 'Woundology' - the definition of it is: 'Woundology is the tendency to insistently hold on to old...
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    I met the right guy at the wrong time now he has reconnected do I tell him about the trauma

    Thank you so much Movingforward10 for your response. This is very true, you have described it perfectly. I also agree about not going into detail. There is a way of saying something without actually saying it if you know what I mean. This feels safer and less exposing.
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    I met the right guy at the wrong time now he has reconnected do I tell him about the trauma

    I met a guy online and were long distance for three months to begin with. He was originally from the same city I live in but was finishing a university course in the north of the country. We really hit it off and it seemed like the perfect match. I helped him apply for a job and when he had his...
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    After a “flashback” do you feel more present day...

    Whenever I was interrupted in conversation, the person would cut in while I was talking and my mind would go blank. I would struggle to think of what I had been saying and spend a while saying "erm, erm...what was I saying?" I would become anxious because I knew what was about to happen. The...
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    Dom Violence I am picking up on my triggers

    It is positive that you have identified this now and pieced together what triggered you back then. It is also very positive that he is an ex and this is not a current relationship. Hopefully you can take this time to heal and process it all perhaps in therapy. Sounds like your ex was overbearing...
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    I fear I'm going to kill someone

    Yes. I was triggered last year in my relationship big time and since then when we argue my go to emotion is anger. It is an intense anger that rises and my bf is on the autistic spectrum and can obsess over issues and like to take control of situations and therefore control me. He recognises...
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    My boyfriend's behaviour is erratic and is really triggering me. I am struggling to think straight right now

    I am not married to him. He told me to move in with him and we would get married. I moved in and he said marriage is just a piece of paper and he has changed his mind but said "we can still be together forever". I was hurt at the time but then focused on myself for 3 years and my career. I did...
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    My boyfriend hit me again and I left him

    I am so sorry you have experienced that Eve. You have done the right thing by ending it and it will take you a while to heal but please don't blame yourself for realising after 2 years that he was an abuser. Chances are you did notice red flags but gave him the benefit of the doubt. I am sure...
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    My boyfriend's behaviour is erratic and is really triggering me. I am struggling to think straight right now

    I have lived with my boyfriend for 3 years and we met 4 years ago. Earlier this week I arranged something for our 4th anniversary, I booked a table at a restaurant we really like and found a really good deal as it is usually expensive. All paid for and ready to go, I know that if I don't arrange...
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    Helped my girlfriend leave her abusive ex and all I got was this lousy ptsd

    I have just read about your experiences and really commend you for how supportive you have been of your girlfriend. You put yourself at risk and the situation caused you and your family stress. You clearly really care for her. I do agree that now you should focus on you and that sounds great...
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