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  1. M

    Starting To Date With Did (dissociative Identity Disorder)?

    Does anyone have any advice about starting to date with DID? I haven't really dated at all except briefly and never said anything to my partner at the time. At what point do you share the DID diagnosis with your partner? Do you warn them in the first few months? Wait until things are more...
  2. M

    DID Questions for other did folk

    I know there are many threads around here on this topic, but I wanted to start a thread specifically for those of us that have dissociative identity disorder that have questions for each other about things that happen within our systems, or road blocks we run into with getting proper...
  3. M

    Desire To Know Abusers Criminal History. Just Me?

    Ever since my therapist had a police friend of hers look into my abuser (criminal history) I've had a huge desire to know his previous charges, time he served, why he served time. Does anyone else feel this way, or just me? Also, does anyone know how I would go about getting this information in...
  4. M

    Feel Like Quitting Therapy

    I feel like quitting therapy for the first time in almost 2 years. Nothing to do with my T, or how helpful she is, or anything related to her at all. I haven't felt like I've wanted to run this bad in a really long time. A lot of it has to do with so much happening in the days following my...
  5. M

    Free Windows 10 Upgrade

    I have put the link below to the Forbes article on it. Apparently it will be free to any Windows 7 or 8 user for up to a year after it's release (if you want it you need to upgrade before July 29, 2016). I'm not a Windows user, but thought I would put this out there for any of you who are and...
  6. M

    Fear That T Will Retire

    I had a group therapy weekend this weekend, my T was a facilitator, and there was another T there facilitating. The other T announced that she was retiring (her and T ended up saying their ages), so T is only a year younger than this other T who is retiring. And cue the fear. I just got my...
  7. M

    Questions For Anyone With Did

    If anyone read my thread from a week or so ago - T Thinks I Have Did? - you know that T recently (last two weeks) has said that she thinks I have DID. I go to a new psychiatrist on Tuesday and hopefully then they will tell me one way or another if they agree with T. Anyways, I think I posted in...
  8. M

    DID T thinks i have did?

    I'm really shaken up after my session with my T today. We talked about the serious dissociation incident I had about 1.5 weeks ago where I "woke up" having sex with a random guy I didn't know. [Side note: got tested, and I didn't get anything nasty from the guy. Now to wait until I can take a...
  9. M

    Dissociation Gone To A New Extreme

    I tried to read up on this when I got home, but I can't seem to find anything pertaining to this particular thing. I've been diagnosed with dissociation in correlation to my PTSD. Not something separate. I've been having a rough last few weeks, and I've been dissociating more frequently. Today...
  10. M

    Verbal Vomit?

    I see T tomorrow afternoon, not sure if I will get the extra session I asked for. We will see when tomorrow comes I guess. Verbal vomit... I have this huge "need" to just spill my heart out to T tomorrow. Is there some kind of common curtesy in regards to that? Do I warn T about the upcoming...
  11. M

    Asked For What I Needed

    Today I just finished a long weekend of group therapy (T was one of the two therapist's running it), it was really hard. I was already having a really rough week leading up to it, hadn't been to work for the first 3 days last week because of mental health reasons, then Thursday and Friday I was...
  12. M

    Feeling Really Depressed

    A lot of this has to do with Little (little side of me) coming out 2 weeks ago. Little just consumes me and takes over, I try to shove her away, back into the closet but she fights back. When Little gets really upset or angry I lose, and I don't know what she does, but I get hurt when she takes...
  13. M

    Intense Fear Of Someone Finding It

    I'm looking for others who experience this as well. I have such an intense fear of someone coming across videos or pictures of my CSA on the internet. I don't know if it was ever posted online, I just know that photos and videos were taken. It causes me anxiety on a daily basis, it doesn't go...
  14. M

    Unfamiliar With This Feeling

    Just had therapy with T, told her about the report card comments from when I was little and when things changed. A funny feeling came over me and I had to sit on the floor. I felt so little, I still do, I don't remember leaving her office, I remember bits of going home. Like standing in the...
  15. M

    Sad Reading When I Changed As A Child

    I'm visiting my parents this weekend for Easter, and my mum gave me my folder of school report cards and records. I just sat for an hour reading every comment from kindergarten to grade 12. My heart hurts. I can see exactly between what times the sexual abuse began in my life. It's so heart...
  16. M

    Cousin Just Attempted Suicide

    I just got a phone call that my cousin attempted suicide. She OD'd like I did. She told her mom that she was suicidal, and ASKED to go to the hospital, my aunt told her no she was fine and to just take a shower. I'm so upset, she's not ok. The drugs she took can cause a lot of damage to her...
  17. M

    Therapy Weekend

    This weekend I have the first of three weekend group therapy sessions that span over the next three months. It starts Friday night, goes all day Saturday (early morning, until late evening), and all day Sunday (early morning start, early evening finish). It's a special thing my T invited me to...
  18. M

    Losing Friends/support

    Really sad and hurt right now. I had a friend that has now completely tossed me aside. They were my sole support other than my T. A little over a week ago she really hurt me by sharing very personal and private stuff about me with a mutual friend. I voiced that it wasn't ok that she did that...
  19. M

    Survival Sex

    For those that don't know what Survival Sex is here is a link to give a brief idea of what it means: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Survival_sex I'm not proud, I'm scared, but I'm also desperate. Some of you are familiar with my past from previous posts a year ago or so, and some more recent...
  20. M

    Back For Now. Stuck In A Deep Depression.

    I haven't been on here in a very long time, not sure when I last posted - if it was before or after my most recent attempt in September. Anyways, here's the update portion before the I need advice/support portion. Update: Made another attempt on my life in September, was taken in by ambulance...
  21. M

    Made Another Attempt

    I haven't posted on here frequently since my last attempt at the end of February this year, I've been pretty absent except to read posts, but more recently I've just been absent period. I had a lot of negative events happen one right after another. Losing my car because a coverage I paid for...
  22. M

    Court Date Tomorrow

    So tomorrow is the first appearance in court for the stranger that assaulted me on July 4 while I was working. I don't have to be there, so the stress I feel surrounding this is not due to being scared of facing the man. I can't fully explain why I'm nervous about tomorrow's court date, all I...
  23. M

    I Can Feel Myself Spiralling Down

    I didn't post on here what happened last week so I will do a quick update because it is a big factor in this downward spiral I'm in. Last Wednesday I cut for the first time in a while. I was dissociating really bad for the days leading up to it. I took a sick day from work. I ended up cutting...
  24. M

    Triggered Yet Again

    I kind of disappeared from here for a while. This is my most recent post on here, kind of important to what I'm about to post because it factors in greatly to the overwhelm. Without rehashing the whole post again, here is a link to the original...
  25. M

    Extremely Triggered

    I know I haven't been on here as often as I normally am. A lot has happened. I will talk about that in another post at a later date. The main thing is how triggered I am. On Friday at work I was molested by a trucker at the event I was working. There came a point where he had the opportunity to...
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