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    Relationship Last ditch effort

    Thanks for these perspectives @Never_falter2 and @Sweetpea76. Sweetpea, the approach you describe is the approach I've taken all along. The problem is, it hasn't really worked. He has tried, but he is inconsistent. So perhaps, therein lies my answer. Never_falter2, these are good suggestions...
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    Relationship Last ditch effort

    Thank you so much, both of you. One question I really want to ask is - is an ultimatum ever a good idea? I am getting close to walking away. It seems that he often takes action only when something is at stake. I have been tossing up the idea of saying: Okay, I am doing *this* to address my...
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    Relationship Last ditch effort

    All of that sounds pretty familiar. Cheers!
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    Relationship Last ditch effort

    Ah I see. Yep, he's avoiding it for that reason, I suspect. These are all good tips - thank you. I have tried to give him a few of the strategies that worked for me in the past. I don't know if he's tried any of them. And yes, I often remind him what an amazing, selfless person he is and how...
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    Relationship Last ditch effort

    Thanks for your response Ronin. I'm not sure I understand quite what you mean by his drinking preventing him from starting PTSD treatment. He often says that he wants to stop drinking because he doesn't want to lose me. This concerns me greatly - it means that his motivation is extrinsic, not...
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    Relationship Last ditch effort

    On a good day he will agree that he needs to seek treatment. On a bad day he will insist that he can deal with it himself - despite all the evidence to the contrary. The worst of it is having to listen to him brush off the latest major health scare as if it were funny anecdote. It's often not...
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    Relationship Last ditch effort

    Thanks for your message Sweetpea. We have some very frank conversations about this. I understand that, in the past, he has made a few abortive attempts to take his own life in an active way (however not since he has been with me). But he swears to me that now he absolutely wants to live...
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    Relationship Last ditch effort

    Hi everyone, This is my first post on the forum. I am here in a last ditch effort to talk out my experiences with other supporters, as I'm not one to give up on a relationship too easily. So here goes: My partner has spent many years working in conflict areas. His life was threatened many...
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