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  1. open eyes

    Recovery snuck up on me.

    This made my heart warm. Thank you so much.
  2. open eyes

    Recovery snuck up on me.

    A year and a half ago, I finally found the strength to put an end to a 2-year-long sexually and emotionally abusive relationship. After the initial shock and sorrow of losing the person who had been at the center of my life for so long, I fell into a fragile elation. I felt weightless; I never...
  3. open eyes

    2,000 miles from home and struggling, have no support system here

    I'm across the country from my friends and family this summer for a 3 month internship. 9 days ago I got diagnosed with Conversion Disorder, which, in short, is when severe unresolved trauma leads to sensory/neurological issues. It can manifest in many ways. For me, I have bouts of numbness and...
  4. open eyes

    Does anyone else have PTSD from different traumatic experiences?

    Hey :) I'm also a 21 y/o with multiple traumas. I've endured several sexual assaults at various ages, had a guy I was dating threaten me with a knife, and lost my high school boyfriend to suicide which was a very traumatic loss. I am so sorry that you're also experiencing complex PTSD. I hope...
  5. open eyes

    Sufferer Very successful in life, then divorced, commited a crime, then diagnosed with CPTSD + autism

    Hi Shervin, I can relate to quite a bit of what you've been dealing with. Our stories are very different but we have some common ground, so I hope if nothing else, this makes you feel a little less alone and a little more validated. I too am CPTSD, autistic, and live a successful work life...
  6. open eyes

    I'm angry

    I love this. Thank you.
  7. open eyes

    Other Help an autistic gal out with how to spot creeps

    I define creep as someone who is acting without my best interests in mind, and someone who is looking for a person they perceive to be easily manipulated or taken advantage of. "Danger" for me includes stuff like getting followed, stalked, assaulted, etc.
  8. open eyes

    I'm angry

    I'm just angry and it's eating me alive. My body is falling apart because of it. Last April my ex sexually assaulted me. He choked me hard during sex when I did not consent to it, and I could barely speak or breathe. I him to stop choking me, and he stopped for a minute, but then did it again...
  9. open eyes

    Other Help an autistic gal out with how to spot creeps

    Thanks for your thought-out response. Could you give me an example of a casual boundary to set with acquaintances?
  10. open eyes

    Other Help an autistic gal out with how to spot creeps

    I've got a long history of trauma... multiple sexual assaults, one of which resulted in pregnancy, getting threatened with a knife by a boyfriend, childhood abuse, death of someone very close to me... the list goes on. I'm also on the autism spectrum. I think my social difficulties have gotten...
  11. open eyes

    Sexual Assault Did my ex boyfriend sexually assault me?

    In January, I dumped my boyfriend of 2 years. There were many reasons why, but the main ones were because of his pattern of selfish behavior and compulsive lying. Last year, we were having sex and at the bare minimum, he crossed boundaries. I consented to having sex initially. Previously, I've...
  12. open eyes

    Lamotrigine?

    I've been taking lamotrigine for over 6 months now, & it significantly helps stabilize my mood without making me "flat" like lithium did. It also doesn't sedate me.
  13. open eyes

    I've Pretty Much Just Lost My Family.

    I sympathize & understand your frustrations, but if you're not willing to let them to know what's going on with you (PTSD) then how an you expect them to treat you appropriately?
  14. open eyes

    Research How Has Creative Therapy Worked For You?

    Hi! I was introduced to art therapy at a psych hospital about a year ago, & in January I started seeing an outpatient art therapist regularly. I'd love to share some of the projects I've done that helped me the most. -making a monster out of clay that represents my fears, & then building...
  15. open eyes

    How Much Can One Person Handle?

    Do you really trust him completely & tell him everything if he isn't aware of the extent of your problems, as you said? It's easy for someone who loves you to say that that it doesn't matter; they'll be there for you; etc. Dealing with it in person is a whole other matter. Like others have...
  16. open eyes

    News Potential Drug Target For Ptsd Prevention

    I agree with @Recovery4Me.... It seems ironic in a very sick way that we are subjecting other animals to trauma in order to find a drug to help humans process trauma.
  17. open eyes

    Undiagnosed Hi, I Guess

    Everyone reacts to panic attacks & anxiety differently. It can manifest as rage, fight or flight responses, hyperventilation... as well as "shutting down" as you say you do. Reactions to panic attacks do not necessarily indicate PTSD. However, childhood sexual abuse is a serious trauma & if...
  18. open eyes

    What Not To Say To Someone With Ptsd

    "That doesn't count as a sexual assault"
  19. open eyes

    Today Is The 3 Year Anniversary And I Am Not Doing Well

    Yes, I have actually. I did 5 sessions last summer. I still have mixed feelings towards it, but I'm considering going back & giving it another go.
  20. open eyes

    Prazosin Use In Uk To Treat Ptsd

    Prazosin doesn't treat PTSD but it helps a ton with nightmares. I only have nightmares about one a week now, as opposed to nightly before medication. When I do have nightmares, they don't bother me as much.
  21. open eyes

    Today Is The 3 Year Anniversary And I Am Not Doing Well

    Three years ago today I was sexually assaulted in a swimming pool & came close to drowning. This week is also the one year anniversary of my psychotic break & my first psychiatric hospitalization. The month of June has always been really tough for me but this year is even more so. I'm so...
  22. open eyes

    Sufferer I'm New. 16/f. I Really Need Help.

    Hi, I'm a 16 year old female too & I also went through sexual abuse between the ages of 6-7. I repressed these memories as well until about a year & a half ago, so I can really relate to what you're going through... There is nothing wrong with you. When something happens that our brain can't...
  23. open eyes

    Afraid To Find My Voice.

    Before you can learn to do any of this you have to develop confidence & self worth. The root of all of your problems- not being able to stand up for yourself, not wanting to report your rapist, being afraid of being a disappointment, etc.- they're all based in low self esteem. You need to...
  24. open eyes

    Sufferer I'm New Here And Having Relapse Of Ptsd

    Hi, my PTSD was caused by something different, but I can relate to some of what you're saying about relapsing. When something triggers me, I have to sort of analyze it in my head. I try to remove myself from the situation a little bit, & determine whether it's an actual or perceived threat...
  25. open eyes

    Unstable Moods

    Those kinds of thoughts don't just fade away without any kind of intervention. Not to sound pessimistic, but it's exactly the kind of thing that will spiral out of control if you try to hide them. Any time that you feel you need to do something self destructive (cut, drink, smoke, etc.) in...
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