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The past week has been complete hell. I'm crying all the time, feeling distant again, crying constantly about every little, tiny thing that's upsetting me and taking my anger out on my T. I've text her so often today and she says she thinks I need a break. I took that as abandonment (funny how I...

I think it's courageous that you're going to talk to your T about how you really feel. It's so incredibly difficult to do, but we're here to support you through this. D/x

Thank you so much for your response. I managed to fall asleep around 3:30AM, but a nightmare followed and I woke up feeling rather upset, which was the emotion of the day. I'm having nightmares every single night and I can't stand it. I always fall asleep with a DVD on, as the background noise...

My T has been saying exactly this to me. I spoke to her today and she's urging me to stick with them, because she wants me to process the trauma and see what happens next inside my head (if anything), so I can understand what's happened, if that makes sense.

I love hearing things like this. :smile: It makes you wonder what it is that's actually leaving the body. people say it's your soul that leaves, but surely, you feel something deep in your soul? An out of body experience isn't felt, it's disconnected from emotion. Sorry, just thinking out loud..

2:20AM and I'm still awake. I seem to be getting more panicky by the minute too, which isn't great. I think it's because I know I've got to go to sleep sooner or later, but I keep getting snippets of nightmares I've had lately and it makes me restless and I can't relax. I'm listening to...

Don't feel guilty. I relate to 'that dark place' feeling too - you can feel yourself slipping back there and the tinyest thing can push you further and further back there each time. You shouldn't ever apologise for how you're feeling. You are not a 'big nothing'. I've read your posts here and...

I have flashbacks where I'm right next to myself, watching myself being kicked and dragged up the stairs etc. It's weird, but I can't help thinking how amazing the body is for doing this to protect itself.

Absolutely. I've been put on the pill to try to help with it. We'll see!

This sounds like what's happened to me when I was a little girl. It's always been in my thumb that I feel it first (I don't know why) and then I don't feel real. I'm like a smaller version of myself, everything is further away and noises get muffled and distorted. It doesn't last more than 10...

:hello: I'm in Bristol. Any room for one more? D/x

:hello: I just wanted to say hello.

It's 12:30AM right now and I really don't want to go to sleep tonight. I've been having really horrible nightmares that seem to last ALL night and when I wake up, I'm sweating and I feel like I'm about to have a panic attack. I'm on Sertraline and I'm convinced it's a side effect of it. I...

I'm exactly the same, especially lately. I sleep with a fan on and the windows open (only when it's hot like it is in Summer, at the moment) and I still wake up completely drenched in sweat. It's horrible.

I'm totally guilty for doing this, not just with my T, but doctors and any person really who has shown me they care & been there for me. I latch onto people so much to the point of obsession. What I did with my past doctor (God, I miss her..) was to tell her that I felt I was getting too...

Thank you so much for your responses - it's so amazing to talk to others who can relate to situations and emotions. Reading the experiences with EMDR is really helpful to me and knowing that it's going to be insanely difficult, but it's OK, because it needs to happen for me to grow, 'let it go'...

Yes, always..

It's something I never really got as a child and so now when I'm triggered, all I want is for someone to stroke my hair until I calm down and fall asleep.

I love reading your posts, Amethist. You really 'get' the symptons and seem to know what to do in a crisis moment. It's so nice to hear that the 'shutdown' episode has decreased in time. Slowly as we go! D/x

First of all welcome, I'm new here too. Second of all, it's amazing that you plucked up the courage to get in touch with a therapist and book an appointment. This is your first step and it's an amazing one. You should be really proud of yourself. I've had people dismiss how I've felt on...

Absolutely. I haven't had a 'restful' sleep in a long time. I think it's because my nightmares won't let me sleep?

Your reply made a lot of sense, thank you. I'm really close to my T, so I know I can ask for what I need, but I don't think I know what that is? I do need to do some safety work though - it's a really big problem for me.

Being creative was one of my coping mechanisms when I was younger. I believe my creativity stems from the traumas.

Running away, literally, metorphorically and emotionally is a special trick of mine.

Yes, all the time.