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    Narc mom dying of brain cancer

    Thank you for your words too.
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    Narc mom dying of brain cancer

    You're not at all over-stepping. I guess it's true there is a phone. I'm sure someone would tell me and I could call her if that's what I want when the time comes. For now, I can't talk to her. Thank you for the suggestion. I'm still sorry for your experience. Though it's wonderful that you had...
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    Narc mom dying of brain cancer

    Thank you everyone for validating my feelings. I still feel shocked, I think, that this is how it's going to end for her. And also that she's apparently a drug addict (idk why it shocks me, no one else was surprised). I'm generally pretty happy. But when I think about her, I get so triggered and...
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    Narc mom dying of brain cancer

    Thank you so much. One thing I will say is I think this experience definitely brought me and my siblings closer together. Especially my brother. My mother isolated us from him since he has a different dad and then he moved far away so it's been hard to reconnect. We're all keeping in touch...
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    Narc mom dying of brain cancer

    Hello, it's been a few years since I've been here. First, I just want to say thank you to everyone who keeps this page going and to this community for always being here with their support. Well, this year and last year have been rough for everyone. But this year has hit me hard. I guess I'm...
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    Breaking Glass

    I am constantly surprised at how much I share in common with people here. Just knowing that makes me feel so much more sane. I don't have money to take care of a dog right now. I'm in college so expenses are high and time is limited. :/ But I have been doing lots of research on doggos trying...
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    I Get Scared In Front Of My Boyfriend

    And maybe in the long run, a lot more. :) We can be happy still.
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    I Get Scared In Front Of My Boyfriend

    Hello, I've been with my boyfriend for four years this year too. I have issues doing anything remotely sexual with him, sometimes even kissing is too sexual. I understand the fear. Have you considered couples counseling? It seems like your boyfriend really cares about you, so I'm sure he'd be...
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    Breaking Glass

    Yesterday, I couldn't stop having panic attacks. I had five before 12pm. I used to just be anxious and depressed. I was getting better for a while. My depression isn't really there anymore. But now I'm even more anxious. And now it's accompanied by anger. I haven't felt this angry since I was...
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    Childhood If I Wanted To Google Signs Of Abuse

    I think you're right. And even when you're being abused, there's not much out there to tell you how to know if you start abusing others in turn. Just that it might happen now that you've been abused. Nothing to tell you for sure how to stop yourself from becoming an abuser. Nothing to tell...
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    Violent Flashbacks

    I have been doing research on that, but I haven't started it yet. I'm just having so many issues that it's hard to tackle them all at once. And I don't know how I would even start EDM
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    Violent Flashbacks

    Recently, my flashbacks have gotten more frequent and more intense despite the fact that I've been managing my symptoms very well. My therapist says this is probably due to a lot of new changes in my life recently. I transferred to a huge university and I live away from my dad and my sister...
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    Dealing With The Thoughts Of What Could Have Been

    My professor gave me some very excellent advice about my own trauma this week: if you have some kind of family secret that no one is supposed to talk about...then talk about it. Because if you don't, not only will it eat you alive, it will allow the perpetrators to think they can get away with...
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    Starting Over

    Thank you. I've had symptoms both change and return. My night terrors came back. My flashbacks became more frequent and worse. I started grinding my teeth, then stopped. And so on. I have a long list of things going on.
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    Starting Over

    Thank you so much. I know you are right. It's so hard to make my brain think the way it should. The anger, however, isn't quite so simple. Yes, I've lashed out at others when I shouldn't. But I don't even like being angry at all. I'm angry about being angry. And I can direct it at my abuser and...
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    Starting Over

    Wednesday I saw my therapist for the first time in a little over two years. I thought I had finally reached this place where I could manage my symptoms. But over this past year, my PTSD changed on me. I didn't even know that could happen. Apparently it's completely normal. When I went to my...
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    Sufferer Looking For A Way Up

    Funny you say that! My boyfriend is studying to be an engineer. Something about the way their minds work I suppose.
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    Sufferer Looking For A Way Up

    I trust him. I've told him most of the things I've gone through, save for some minor incidents that I don't always remember. It's difficult for him to understand. He hasn't had a very easy life either, but he's always managed to work through whatever comes his way. So I think he's struggling to...
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    Worst Anxiety Attack In Ages Last Night

    This set back could have been a combination of missing your pill and prepping for this bar. If you've never had this kind of stress at the same time as missing a pill, it makes sense that you wouldn't be familiar with being triggered this way. The exam alone is enough to make anyone panic. Try...
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    Sufferer Looking For A Way Up

    Thank you so much. I asked him to do some research on his own, but he believes he can learn what he needs from me. It's frustrating because sometimes those who suffer just can't put it into words. Maybe if I showed him this website he could change his mind.
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    Sufferer Looking For A Way Up

    I suppose she might. She suggested in the past allowing my dad to come, but I feel anxious having others there. I guess I'll know after the appointment. I'm supposed to go to it soon.
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    Sufferer Looking For A Way Up

    I think my therapist would think that's a good idea. But I've had bad experiences with group therapy. I don't do well with it. Another piece of my trauma. I'm hoping there's a way I can get him to understand without having to do that. Plus I think group sessions means he would have to pay as...
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    Sufferer Looking For A Way Up

    Understandable!
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    Sufferer Looking For A Way Up

    I haven't gone to the appointment yet. It's later today. I hope it goes well. I liked it better when my anger dissolved into sadness. I think depression is easier to control. I guess we'll see.
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    Sufferer Looking For A Way Up

    Thank you for the encouragement!
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