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    Triggered by FKA Twigs Lawsuit

    dang all I wanted to do was rant did not think it would cause this much of a problem :/
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    Triggered by FKA Twigs Lawsuit

    Hi all :) I'm sure some of you have heard about FKA Twig’s domestic abuse lawsuit against Shia Lebeouf. I felt quite triggered by it and just wanted to say how I was feeling on here because I don't really have anyone to talk to. Even though I don’t know her I’m really proud and happy for her...
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    I love you and I hate myself

    Awwww thank you same to you! @ms spock 💜💜🎄🥳
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    I love you and I hate myself

    Been a few months since I posted on here. Since I'm back in the place where it all happened it only seems appropriate lol. (I actually laughed at that in my head lol) laughing about it seems to be helpful. I told my brothers what happened. They were so understanding and supportive. It made me...
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    Am I just filling in the blanks or are these new memories?

    My recollection of the abuse that happened is so broken I can't tell if I'm having a real flashback or if I'm just filling in the blanks. I blacked out almost every time I was with him. I remember sitting on the bed after he would leave, I would just stare into space and replay what had just...
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    back where my abuse happened-vividly real flashblacks

    @Friday @Movingforward10 Thank you for your replies, it helps more than you know. Unfortunately, as much as I wish I could I am not able to leave the house in the ways @Friday suggested. My mother is the one who rents it and her lease goes for another year. I am begging her not to renew it...
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    back where my abuse happened-vividly real flashblacks

    Hi all :) its been a while since I last came on here. I remember how much it helped me knowing I wasnt alone so I decided to post again I moved away from the house in which my abuse happened for college but im back again because school is on break and im feeling all sorts of things right now...
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    Other Been avoiding getting a proper diagnosis haha

    @Powder Thank you for the advice. Now that you mention the correlation between PTSD and certain foods , it makes a lot of sense. Im going to try your suggestion and see what foods affect me. im so glad someone can understand where I am coming from regarding Rx and Dx. After reading your...
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    I love you and I hate myself

    I was badly triggered today after cleaning out my closet. I found an item that I had used around the time I was with my ex and forgot about. I stood there and it felt like the room shifted and I was back under him again, being assaulted. It was like I could physically feel it all over again. I...
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    I feel so lonely, I don’t really have friends (VENT)

    Thanks for replying :) I always find that I resonate with your responses a lot. I think that describes the dynamic of most my friendships perfectly. I am usually the one giving advice but do not receive it. Sometimes I believe my struggles are too "big" for my friends to handle because while...
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    I feel so lonely, I don’t really have friends (VENT)

    I dont really have anyone to talk to. Not only about my mental health but just in general. I don’t really have friends anymore. So yeah im coming on here to vent because I don’t have anywhere else to. One of my closet friends, someone who I would call my twinflame ghosted me at the begining of...
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    Other Been avoiding getting a proper diagnosis haha

    Bipolar disorder. It has affected both my mother and father’s side of the family.
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    Other Been avoiding getting a proper diagnosis haha

    I also have been having trouble in regards to food and eating. I starve myself for days at a time but sometimes I just don't feel the need to eat or that the hunger I feel isn't really hunger and I just suppress it. And then also sometimes I will feel hungry and go to eat but the thought of food...
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    Other Been avoiding getting a proper diagnosis haha

    I'm pretty sure I have an undiagnosed mental illness but I don't know what it is and I am scared to face it. Earlier this year I tried to overdose and was baker acted and put into the hospital. They put me on Cymbalta and a mix of other medication (can't remember the names but one of them were...
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    I love you and I hate myself

    I am going to take control of my trauma. I finally spoke with my therapist and it felt soooo good to tell someone what he did to me and tell them how much its been affecting me. She already has given me things to do to help take that control back. She told me part of the reason I feel the way I...
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    My boyfriend hit me again and I left him

    Hey @EveHarrington Im so sorry to hear what you went through. I myself recently left an abusive relationship this year. I completely understand everything you are feeling and just know you are not alone. I know its hard not to feel ashamed for not leaving sooner. I felt the same way but then I...
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    First date with a man since abuse PLS HELP

    Thank you for that, I needed to hear it. I'm going to try and focus on myself before I take on a whole another person.
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    I love you and I hate myself

    Hiii @Movingforward10 Thank you for that piece of advice from your T. I often find myself feeling ashamed of myself for getting myself into such a terrible situation. But I didn't "get myself into" it, I could not have known how abusive he would be. And he shouldn't be abusive in the first...
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    I love you and I hate myself

    I don't know how to deal with this any longer. I am weak. I can't do this any longer. Its all becoming too much to handle. I feel like I am going to physically and mentally explode.
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    I love you and I hate myself

    I have to start accepting that I will never get the closure I need from him. He will never apologize for or acknowledge the abuse he put me through. I want to isolate myself more and more. I am embarrassed with myself. I hate myself.
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    I love you and I hate myself

    5 AM thoughts: FFFFF YOUUUUUU FOR WHAT YOU DID TO ME. I HATE THIS BODY I AM TRAPPED IN. YOU MADE ME FEEL GROSS AND USED LIKE A TOY. YOU CONSTANTLY CRITICIZED ME AND TOLD ME I WASN'T ENOUGH. I HAVE TO LIVE WITH THE BURDEN OF KNOWING WHAT YOU DID TO ME AND KNOWING THAT YOU WILL GO WITHOUT...
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    First date with a man since abuse PLS HELP

    Wow that really put a lot into perspective for me. I am too trusting of people. I trust them like I trusted my dad when I was a kid haha. Thank you so much for everything you had to say. I need to stop giving people my trust when they have not earned it. I think I am going to cancel again...
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    First date with a man since abuse PLS HELP

    Well we have been talking for a while and he has been really patient with me. We were supposed to have 2 different dates already but I cancelled both and he was very understanding and he actually stuck around. I also told him that I do not want to hook up and he said that it didnt matter and...
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    First date with a man since abuse PLS HELP

    Okay excuse my french but im flipping the f*ck out. I have a date scheduled for tomorrow. Its currently 3 am and I cant sleep because of the anxiety and anticipation. This is my first time talking to someone or going on a date with someone since my ex boyfriend. Im so scared. My heart and my gut...
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    Why do I purposely trigger myself?

    Hi a little update for you I finally decided to contact my therapist today. Thank you so much for your advice, it gave me the motivation to contact her. :))
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