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  1. R

    Finding a Therapist

    I’m so sorry it’s this is hard. I had a rough go finding someone too. I remember being so frustrated that I had great health insurance but no one was taking patients. I would get excited because I liked their description only to have them not respond or respond they were not taking patients. I...
  2. R

    Retrauma and bad experiences help

    It took me years of doing grounding and calming work. Years of cognitive restructuring. I know it doesn’t work for everyone but I dove in and kept doing it when I didn’t think it it would and when I couldn’t see progress. Looking back the progress was there but excruciatingly slow. I never...
  3. R

    Is this an unrealistic expectation?

    It was great to see this thread and see you process this. It is pretty hard to feel hurt then make your way to the other side and commit to talking to him directly. It’s so hard building new relationships. I remember when I started with my current therapist feeling like it would be too much work...
  4. R

    What Did You Do For You Today???

    Only left 30 mins late. Said I had an appointment so I had to leave on time. Managed to make it out 30 mins late but was better than last week. Cuddled with cats instead of doing house work or making dinner.
  5. R

    Other Looking for help with coping when triggered by other people's actions.

    I second grounding exercises. They were really hard for me when I started but now they feel like second nature. It gets easier over time and a lot of messy practice. I remember when it seemed like I would never get through a day. I wish I could say I don't get triggered or have flashbacks. I...
  6. R

    I Don’t Want To Go to Therapy Tomorrow.

    Feeling this way is such a trick. We know deep down we should go but all of our s&*# PTSD defenses tell us to run away. I am feeling the same. I think of all the ways to cancel my appointments. The other person who said they don't cancel until I can think of real reasons not go. I don't want...
  7. R

    Therapy during high stress

    Thank you! Sorry about that.
  8. R

    Therapy during high stress

    Sorry to hear you are having a rough time too. I feel bad complaining because everyone is under so much more stress. It’s hard to see an end. I feel lucky to have found someone who seems to get their is a time and a place discuss certain things. She never pushes me in any particular direction...
  9. R

    Sexual Assault Lots of changes triggering flashbacks

    Ugh. So sorry this is happening to you. I get the same type of flashbacks at random times. It can be a fantastic day and out of not where I will have body flashbacks. I hope you have someone who can help through this. I found therapy very useful. I still get flashbacks but I can manage them. For...
  10. R

    Sexual Assault Extreme fear after consensual intimacy, anyone else?

    I have had a bout of this lately. I don’t have great suggestions on how to get through. I’ve been talking to my wife a lot. Asking for help from my therapist. I’m trying not to avoid sex because that makes it worse but I’m also don’t push myself too hard.
  11. R

    Therapy during high stress

    I started therapy (after a successful run 20 years ago) in 2020 when my PTSD relapsed during COVID. I was lucky to find a therapist who works well with me and never pushed. Despite my defenses we have built up trust. I had reached the point where I was actually able to improve my PTSD symptoms...
  12. R

    What coping skill are you using now or within the past day

    * putting on headphones and cleaning * put my timer on my phone, laying down, closing my eyes, and breathing * petting my kitties * snuggling my wife
  13. R

    Did your therapist share their treatment plan with you?

    I went to my very first therapist with my own goals and she seemed to get with the program. She helped me get connected with a great DBT program. There was no need for a treatment plan discussion there. It was all very structured with a workbook. When my PTSD flared up after COVID I went back...
  14. R

    Pre therapy nerves on steroids.

    Don't feel like just because it is "normal" for people with PTSD to have anxiety before therapy as a reason for your feelings to be invalid. It's normal for us to feel a lot of really f-ed up things. Just because it is common doesn't mean your feelings aren't real. It doesn't mean that this...
  15. R

    Job interview(s)

    Congrats on making it through the first day. I always find the first few weeks nerve wracking. In some ways it is a lot of fun because you learn new things and you have someone showing you what to do. In other ways it is totally unsettling. Hard to be the "new guy." Even when I am moving into a...
  16. R

    Healthcare workers having COVID stress?

    Thank you for such a thoughtful response. We have had many supportive people. The shifting sands comments rings true. It feels like we can’t ever get our footing. This current spike brings a whole new level of stress. Last time there wasn’t much we could do. One day was normal and the next an...
  17. R

    What Does A Diagnosis Mean to You?

    I hear you. I haven’t had PTSD pretty much all day since we started a new covid surge in my area. No not me. Nothing to see here.
  18. R

    Bad timing in therapy session

    I am not a therapist but worked half my career in mental health and still do a lot of mental health crisis calls in my new career. Don’t think of it as telling her how to do her job. This is about what works for YOU. If it doesn’t work for you to have something dropped in the last part of the...
  19. R

    Anyone in England, UK gone back to in person therapy?

    You are brave. I will ask mine too.
  20. R

    Anyone in England, UK gone back to in person therapy?

    I know the UK laws may be different but in the US you can 100% ask for vaccination status. A medical provider can’t share “my Patient jimmy before you is vaccinated” but they can share their plan with you “I am only seeing unvaccinated patents on Fridays” or “I am not seeing unvaccinated in...
  21. R

    Anyone in England, UK gone back to in person therapy?

    I prefer in person therapy but am worried about what will happen when she goes back. I need to ask my therapist if that is on the horizon and if she is going to make it mandatory. She is in an older building and I am sure the air circulation isn't great. I worry about all the patients who go...
  22. R

    Healthcare workers having COVID stress?

    The last year was hell for health care workers. Hospital workers had it worse. But the pressure has been there for everyone. Then trying to do our jobs and manage vaccine distribution safely with bare bones staff. It felt like the pressure was lifting enough for me to manage it recently. Now...
  23. R

    What form of therapy did you find most useful?

    I’ve used a few forms of therapy. It depends on the person and where they are at in their recovery. I started out with a wonderful psychodynamic type of talk therapist when I was an older teen but she knew I needed a lot of stabilization so I went the cbt/dbt route. That helped me see the world...
  24. R

    New Job with No Time for Therapy

    Fingers crossed that things are going better than expected for you.
  25. R

    Alternative Healing for Trauma/PTSD???

    I am so glad you had a positive experience with horses. I firmly believe horses saved my life. I started riding as an adult after I came down with bipolar. Between the mood cycles and medications I had to take time off of work and school. I couldn't think of anything that I wanted to do, no...
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