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Thanks so much for your post. I think what you’re struggling is really common & I would also like advice on this. The only advice I have is potentially grounding through sounds/textures when you want to be intimate which I sometimes find helpful.

Hi! I don't want to go massively into details but I would like to investigate this condition a bit more. Ideally, I'd like to read literature/resources from the victims perspective, for example looking at long term effects and adult survivors. (A lot of the websites/books I have found seem...

I am experiencing more and more trouble with sleep and was considering going on medication. Does anyone have any experience this this? What medications did you use? Have you had good/bad experiences and why? What questions should I ask my doctor? Also I am looking to get them on the NHS, so any...

Honestly I think this is very brave-- it sounds helpful as well :)

My current theory is that this creates a distancing effect. You externalise your fear and anxiety into something else and it lets you feel more in control because the thoughts are no longer in your head. I think there are definitely levels to this though. For me, high tension content that...

I really resonate with this, especially the wet blanket thing is very accurate. I think the value of shared experiences is a good point— the people I find myself trusting the most when I am depressed are those who can talk about the past/similar experiences (good & bad) in a way that is both...

I think this is really good advice! I often feel like I have two separate ways of behaving or sets of needs depending on whether I am depressed or not. I guess that’s difficult to explain to other people. But also like you said other people view you as a cohesive whole so they aren’t going to...

@Survivor3 Honestly, to me, it sounds like a great group & that you’re doing a pretty good job trying to connect with people in difficult circumstances! I wish you all the best with it & hope people are cool and understanding 😊

I really resonate with this— I think I often force myself into situations which feel unsafe for the sake of feeling like there is Someone there but in reality it often leaves me feeling more isolated. I wonder if it’s in some ways a method of cutting off connection to yourself & your own...

I also struggle with this. When I am struggling I’ve found it’s best to try to write it everyday, even if only a few sentences. How much you write is also a record of your feelings/state that can be useful to reflect on. Some days I write almost nothing and some days I write pages but I don’t...

Thank you so much for sharing your experience. I do think it's helpful to hear-- I definitely also hold people at a distance which I think is what lends to me feeling so disconnected, I guess I'm afraid of the honesty.

Thank you for your reply! I think that's really good advice-- it is okay to start small and work your way up! Not being able to hold a conversation makes me feel very "alien" too.

I have massive problems with depression related to being able to connect with other people in my life. I’m very lucky to have some very good and caring people in my life who listen and who I feel comfortable sharing with, yet, when I am depressed I often walk away from conversations feeling...

@Sophy (in lockdown) Thank you for sharing your experiences-- thinking about negative messages and counter messages is always interesting to me. Good luck with getting in touch with your inner child!

Also I’m so so glad to hear you’re doing better than when you posted !

@Strangelongtrip Ooooh what’s the podcast? If you don’t mind sharing :)

Hey, sounds like you’ve had a really shitty past year. I’m sorry for everything that’s happened, it can be rough when you think you should be improving but you’re just stuck in the same place. I know what it’s like to deal with similar feelings— that no matter what I do it feels like my...

I agree. Connecting over things you love rather than just constantly talking about how crap things are is so important to me. Maybe try netflix party or something along those lines and then you can discuss the film together with your friends. I think you’re on the right lines in that the...

I’m so sorry this happened to you. It must have been a horrible experience to make you feel like a part of you has died. I know the feeling of thinking a part of you, or something inside you, has died. I believe it can be hard & sometimes impossible to go back to who we were before traumatic...

I think clenching generally makes me less stressed when my anxiety is high... definitely a coping mechanism for me. I imagine if there is literally nowhere else for your tension to go, whether physically or in your voice then it ends up in your jaw. I’d love to know if anyone has other thoughts...

I definitely see this in myself. I think most attitudes and approaches can have positives and negatives. I know my “I am not a victim” thing can be very stubborn and unforgiving of myself but it also means I’ll keep working at what I think will help me. Some people I know have a great deal of...

@piratelady Thank you for your reply! I'm sorry you still struggle with shame even after trying to overcome it and I wish you luck in the future 🧡 I've enjoyed it so far! Although I got side tracked reading some other things. I've never read much else specifically addressing shame so I probably...

@Friday Thank you so much for your reply! I also feel like I abandoned this thread a bit and would like to hash it out more. I really like this! I think it's defiantly important to acknowledge everyone struggles with this regardless of their different experiences! Yes! I get this as well, I...

@Movingforward10 Thank you so much for your response! Yes, I can understand that. I think often even when we don't cognitively think we are ashamed our actions or bodies often betray how we feel even when we don't understand it ourselves.. I definitely think that acknowledging it is also an...

Have recently started “It Wasn’t Your Fault” by Beverly Engel. The book talks a lot about how to heal shame imposed by traumatic events. I’ve never related to the concept of shame before but, after discussing it with friends, I realised I do experience feelings related to/caused by shame I...