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  1. RussellSue

    Tannin Sensitivity, GERD, and Meds

    I typically drink only cold-brew coffee and tea because I have a problem with tannins but also have an addiction I have refused to let go of. I upped my intake of green tea recently by 3 cups and lowered my intake of coffee by 1 cup (which lowered my overall caffeine intake) and didn't seem to...
  2. RussellSue

    Differentiating Paranoia from being Sensitive and Overreacting

    I often am not sure if I have paranoia or not. The best example I can give of thinking I might have paranoia is my husband. That man loves me. In the rare instances that he really has been short-tempered with me, I have rampantly verbally attacked him explaining how his behavior was completely...
  3. RussellSue

    Bipolar Mixed Episode - Bipolar

    I've been up, down, down, down, and all around for several days. I'm not sleeping well, can't concentrate, can't think, am massively irritable and paranoid, then hyperactive, and keep flying into fits of hysterical crying, etc. There is a medication issue and I have a psych appointment next...
  4. RussellSue

    Individual Placement and Support (ISP)

    I am curious if anyone here has received ISP supported employment services and if so, were they helpful? Also, if so, would you mind sharing a bit about the experience?
  5. RussellSue

    Mood Disorder Meds that aren't antidepressants

    I am curious what people with bipolar or schizoaffective have taken for mood stabilization that has worked. Lithium worked well for me but it also caused me some thyroid issues. I may end up back on it, regardless, because it did work so well, but I've never been on any other medication that was...
  6. RussellSue

    General PTSD & ASD -- Coping with Cancer

    I found out a couple of days ago that my stepfather just had one kidney, his prostate, and his entire bladder removed due to cancer. He has been sick for over two years, even before we left their area, but he did not want me to know and only gave my mother permission to tell me during our last...
  7. RussellSue


    Tomorrow, I have an online orientation for a volunteer position where I will be teaching digital literacy to refugees. I have already completed all of this organization's other requirements including an earlier online orientation. Yesterday, I rearranged my resume and applied to 3 online...
  8. RussellSue

    Work From Home Stuff

    I created this post in response to a discussion I started having with @Mach123, but it's about work-from-home resources if anyone is interested or wants to discuss further. I thought I would put this here since I am always mucking up threads with long, off-topic posts. I finished a long stint...
  9. RussellSue

    Good & Evil Vs. Sick & Recovering

    At nearly 41, I have been sober for all but 9 months of my legal drinking-age life and because of that, I met a LOT of people in 12-Step meetings. These people were mostly what my family would label "bad people" with histories worse than my own, regrets and scars deeper than mine, and often...
  10. RussellSue

    Exercise for mental health symptoms with chronic pain

    Ok, so my last 18 months have been hard. Oh, heck, my last nearly 41 years have been hard but about 18 months ago, I injured myself in such a way that multiple pieces of soft tissue from my belly button down on my left side have been significantly affected, plus nerves, as well as several...
  11. RussellSue

    Look Ma, No Pills!

    I've been struggling with video camera fears, forever. But I just got through recording a video message for a certain disabilities advocacy organization I want to work with and I didn't take anything for anxiety. Now, I do take Gabapentin for pain and it has an effect on my anxiety but I could...
  12. RussellSue

    Avoiding my Face/Need Support

    In the 1980s, my grandmother loved her video camera. She even loved it the day I got my first real haircut and lost my cookies because I could not find enough hair to cover my “disgusting” face. She was plenty disturbed by seeing me cry hysterically when I realized I couldn’t back into my hair...
  13. RussellSue

    My Crash, His Crash

    Yesterday, my husband had superhero confidence, and the track record to go with it. Today, he's a wreck - overwhelmed with work and school, frustrated with all the little things that have to do with our strange little complicated life here in New Mexico, and he feels like a failure at everything...
  14. RussellSue

    Covid Holiday Plans/Ideas???

    What are you doing for the holidays? Do you have any creative covid holiday plans? My husband and I thought we would make it to central Oregon to see everyone this year, at least for Christmas, but with everything that is going on, we are staying in our rural New Mexico RV for the holidays with...
  15. RussellSue

    Another Round of No More Sister Pain

    I very carefully presented a boundary to my sister today after much deliberation and blowing off steam in here and to my husband ahead of time. I believe my communication with her was more than considerate, sensitive, and reasonable. She responded by rolling out a series of she thought, she...
  16. RussellSue

    Coping with being a family "Embarrassment"

    I am struggling to try to figure out how to keep my sister's perceived attitude towards me from affecting my life rather strenuously at the moment because what I do not need while trying to find a job is to feel like I am still an abnormal little freak who cannot compete in this world because...
  17. RussellSue

    Being Traumatized Siblings

    My sister and I have had an on-again, off-again relationship all of my life. Our family laid it out perfectly: I’m the smart one and she is the pretty one. Naturally, this caused a lot of resentment from both sides. She didn’t really appreciate being pretty and stupid and I didn’t much like...
  18. RussellSue

    Other Thoughts from the Spectrum??? My Mom

    Long part of the story short, I have multiple reasons to believe that my mother has high-functioning autism. I moved about 10 miles from my mother when I was 25 because that area had the cheapest real estate in the state, not because I wanted to have a relationship with my mom. I'd spent most...
  19. RussellSue

    What are you good at???

    Since I have had cPTSD since the dawn of time, I have spent incredible amounts of time fixating on things I am not good at like public speaking, rollerblading, confrontation and standing up straight. As I have gotten older, however, I have had to start paying better attention to what I do well...
  20. RussellSue

    Traumatic Incident Reduction (TIR)

    Has anyone had TIR as a treatment? If so, was it helpful? Full disclosure: I am not asking as a sufferer interested in trying this treatment. I am a sufferer but am asking because I am doing some volunteer work with an organization that uses this treatment in its work. I don't remember having...
  21. RussellSue

    How to slow down an anxious, adrenaline junkie?

    So, friends and physical therapist say I need to slow down. Apparently, it is time I learn to listen to my body. Ugh. Any suggestions on how exactly an anxious, overactive, adrenaline addict like myself ought to try doing that? I know yoga. Please don't say yoga 🥺
  22. RussellSue

    Other More about Nerves

    My PT expressed the other day that the muscles in my left leg have atrophied because of a compressed nerve. We started working on that and immediately I started having the same weird-ass super painful twisting feeling I was having in my leg all last winter. It’s interesting because last year...
  23. RussellSue

    Functional but symptomatic

    Like so many, I got a lot of black and white info about mental health when I was a kid. Ultimately, every person with mental health problems should have their own rubber room. Imagine my confusion when I did real, free grown-up stuff while still struggling with serious PTSD symptoms. And, even...
  24. RussellSue

    Doctor's Office Dissociation

    I looked at my Physical Therapist today and said something very much like this: I have been dissociating while we are working on my stretches. With all the surgeries and painful medical procedures I have had, I expect to be hurt at any medical-type office. You are telling me to make sure I stop...
  25. RussellSue

    Comparing Ourselves to Others

    I was reminded again in here that there is a fundamental difference between the reasonably well-adjusted adult who develops PTSD and the traumatized child who walks out into the world with an abnormally formed brain, finds coping a struggle and meets up with more trauma often in the form of...