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  1. whiteraven

    Poll Favorite self-help resources

    I am writing a self-help book on depression and have included an extensive resource list at the end. The book is near completion, and I just wanted to get a sense for the types of resources you like to use. If you have specific ones that you just love, I'd also like to hear about those!
  2. whiteraven

    Breathing issues...again

    Ever since before I went to Kindergarten, I've had issues with breathing during anxiety. I have a hard time taking a deep breath and sometimes also have heart palpitations with it. I remember my dad telling me to "stop breathing like that" when I was little. It comes and goes - I don't remember...
  3. whiteraven

    Finished program

    I got my final grades today in the copyediting certificate program I've been in for the last year. 99%! So glad to be finished!
  4. whiteraven

    Hospital when I'm supposed to be on vacation. So sad & upset .

    I'm supposed to be on vacation. I planned for weeks cleaning, setting up appointments I'd been skipping for months, planning for my niece to come over, planning for a couple of day trips with my niece and mom. And then, Friday afternoon, I started having severe flank pain. I've always pushed...
  5. whiteraven

    Final Assignment for School

    I have three degrees but am working on a copyediting certificate (remind me not to do this again). The final is a twenty-page, edited manuscript which we've been working on throughout the term. I've been editing for years, so this was just an chance to brush up on the newer stuff, and be able...
  6. whiteraven

    Not Ok

    And no idea how to fix it.
  7. whiteraven

    Anxious and unhappy with "doing"

    This is way longer than I had intended. Sorry about that. Honestly not sure where this belongs - it has elements of anxiety, depression, and just overall dysfunction, so I thought I'd start here. So, wrote this in my diary last night after a very nice trip to a book fair with my niece (she's...
  8. whiteraven

    Physical Pain

    I honestly can't manage the pain. I tossed and turned all night, and this morning I just couldn't get out of bed. Everything hurts. And it makes me so tired. Being in so much pain, all I can think about is that this is never going to get better and that I can't live the rest of my life like this.
  9. whiteraven

    Knock on Back (Patio) Door After Dark

    OMG. I live in a condo with six units, and I am on the bottom floor. Part of the condo is under ground, part opens onto a patio and woods nearby. My very crazy neighbor just knocked on my patio door. It's 9pm. It's dark. My blinds were closed. Who does that?!? So much anxiety. I mean, the...
  10. whiteraven

    DID Looking for Suggestions to Explain Fragmentation

    Ok, I am looking for ideas or suggestions for explaining DID/fragmented selves to people without actually saying it's DID. Backstory: I am going to be doing a thing at church in the near future (I am a member of the UU and pagan), a kind of "membership moment" - why I became a member. I may end...
  11. whiteraven

    Tired and Struggling

    I'm having more days lately when I feel completely apathetic, then very depressed. I've had no appetite for a couple of months (still eating, though, so it's not creating an issue), the things that I usually turn to for comfort when I feel bad--admittedly mostly not incredibly healthy--are of no...
  12. whiteraven

    Physical pain

    I just need to connect with others who might understand. I am in an enormous amount of pain, some from costochondritis, some from fibro, some I can't identify. It hurts to walk, to sit, to lie down. If I touch my arm or leg, It feels like it's bruised - everywhere. Both hands hurt. Last...
  13. whiteraven

    Angry, sad, intolerant of most everything

    Most days, I get up and drag myself through the day, working during the week from home and often doing some sort of volunteer work and going to school in my off time. Unless I'm engaging with my cats, I am very unhappy. I'm living mostly just to get through life until I die. Some days, though...
  14. whiteraven

    Requested Permission to Work from Home

    I've been at this job since August, and I don't hate it, which is a pretty strong and positive statement from me when it comes to work. The only thing I really can't tolerate is working onsite; it takes me an hour or two to get there (and back), and my anxiety level is off the charts when I have...
  15. whiteraven

    If Money Were No Concern...

    Wasn't sure where to put this, so please move as appropriate. I kind of love playing this game. Although admittedly, it sometimes makes me sad that it's mostly fantasy, that I'll never do any of it. One of the things my therapist says is that I can find small ways to do some of the things that...
  16. whiteraven

    What are you reading now? Reading Challenges?

    Ok, so there may already be a thread for books and reading, but I couldn't find it. I love to read and to participate in reading challenges. This year I'm doing two, combined. I'm reading books that begin with "The" and start with each letter of the alphabet. So, for example, I just finished...
  17. whiteraven


    I made an appointment for next week to see my healthcare provider. It's taken me 3 months to make this appointment; the last person I saw at this clinic was condescending and hateful, and I just couldn't go back.
  18. whiteraven

    Death of Good Friend

    I found out today that a good friend died unexpectedly this morning. Just didn't wake up. He was almost 10 years younger than I am. Another friend told me he had said I was "one of the most beautiful, complicated, and intelligent" women he knew. He was difficult to get along with sometimes, but...
  19. whiteraven

    Preoccupation with Death and Dying

    I have an ongoing preoccupation with death. Actually, I'm not sure preoccupation is the right word. I don't deliberately sit and think about it all the time, but nearly everything leaves me thinking about it. This isn't new, and I suspect it's a big reason I've been so depressed the last...well...
  20. whiteraven

    Depression and Time of Day

    I am noticing that I am *much* more depressed during the day. For example, today until about 6pm, I was extremely depressed - unable to do anything. Physically very slow, and everything I did had to be forced. Apathy for everything, even the things I usually fall back on when nothing else...
  21. whiteraven

    No one reaches out - everything is always up to me

    I'm not quite sure how to explain all of this. I played the middle growing up; my mom would tell me something to tell my dad (and vice versa). They never talked to each other, except through me. It was exhausting. Growing up and always, it seems, no one ever reached out to me - to ask me if I...
  22. whiteraven

    Frustrated with new job

    Mostly here to vent. I am really struggling right now. I've lost interest in everything and just really want this life to be over. I got a new job in August, which I was very happy about. After no employment for a year and a half, it felt good to get this job doing something I knew I could...
  23. whiteraven

    Need some ideas for a raffle - “self care”

    I am volunteering for a local adoption program/rescue, and we are having a fundraising event/dinner in October. I created the flyer, and now I am putting together some raffle baskets to donate to the event. One of the baskets is for self-care. I have my own ideas for what to include, but I...
  24. whiteraven

    Trouble taking a deep breath

    Wondering if anyone has breathing issues associated with their anxiety? Mine resurfaced the other day when I went to the zoo, was an issue again during therapy yesterday, and is back tonight. I used to have this all the time - literally - and first remember it when I was around 5. I have to...
  25. whiteraven

    New Job with No Time for Therapy

    Ok, so I got a job offer last Monday for a contractor position doing what I want to do - proofreading. It pays well, is hybrid - starting with 3 days from home and 2 days in the office, then moving to 2 days at home - and it honestly seems like something I can do without all the stress I had in...