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    waking up in terror....

    I recently had a horrible dream that involved SA with my homphobic stepfather....I woke up and was immediately thrown into a state of panic and terror, my breathing became aggreseive and shallow, my body got hot and I began to tremble....I have no way of "calming" myself down in moments like...
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    Anyone else averse to touch and/or being in their body?

    I resonate with this struggle...trauma has made me aggresively touch and sex averse....it has gotten somewhat easier over time...but I still dissasociate in some instances...it fills me with pain to know that other people who want to express genuine intimacy, even non-sexual physical touch, I...
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    ...the sun no longer shines on me

    spent the entire day in bed staring blankly at my ceiling, like I always do.... feeling crippled, locked in a state of fear and anxiety, while floods of suicidal thoughts cycle through my mind...I think I killed myself in my mind 8 times today... I played the same song on repeat for hours...I...
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    Sufferer gay man struggling with lifelong C-PTSD and possible D.I.D....

    ...I definitely resonate with that feeling of being "haunted"...I constantly feel like my entire body is a haunted house and I can hear the ghosts of all the terrible things that have happened to me in a constant loop...it's disturbing and debilitating... I hven't heard of this term...
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    Sufferer gay man struggling with lifelong C-PTSD and possible D.I.D....

    I very much appreciate all the warm welcomes here, knowing that others deal with similar experiences is comforting in a way... it's great to find others who relate, but given the circumstances I am sorry to hear that you have also suffered.....I know it sounds very morbid and cruel of me, but...
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    Sufferer gay man struggling with lifelong C-PTSD and possible D.I.D....

    hey everyone, recently discovered this community, it's great that something like this exists... a bit about me...32 year old out out gay/queer cis man...I've struggled with severe mental health issues for my entire life, I actually even remember being suicidal as young as 5 years old....I was...
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