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My husband just spent 10 days on a ventilator and intubation. The one thing I had to remember is take one day as it comes. Knowledge is power. I was totally in the loop and spent most of my time just there. He was unaware of my presence. Today he is home at age 78 and has seen a full recovery...

That is a tough disorder and abusers do fall within those parameters.

I for one ask myself many times. Why am I doing this? For me it is self awareness. Just because my history is CPTSD does not mean I have to isolate in fear of being under false motives or intent. You bring up some good points and the awareness I think is the first step to healing. You were...

There is such a thing as encouraging, altruism out of kindness and right motives. Not all you suggested is necessarily manipulation. If my statement lacks truth than all of us are doomed to live isolated self centered lives. Motive is the key. There is balance in this.

Being a person with CPTSD there were many times I abruptly blocked someone and cut off relationships when I was triggered. The owner of this forum has an amazing explanation on CPTSD. See if you can locate it on this site. You will have much more insight. It took a long time for me to clue into...

Thinking of you just now. Do you know that abuse knows no socio economic status? I had a radio talk show years ago and interviewed domestic violence victims and therapists one session. One woman’s husband was a choir Director, doctors, lawyers, trades people, across all racial boundaries. The...

I fell asleep writing to you. Ugh. It is 2:00 a.m.! Hope this makes sense. I joined a support group Of abused women. Every community has them. As I listened to the stories it was as if they were sharing my story. There is something almost textbook about abuse and the cycle of abuse. It was as if...

This is where the cycle of abuse begins. Making you doubt your reality and you getting yourself in self blame. There is so much on the internet, counseling, groups . Like all of us it takes some real hard work to break these soul ties. But you have the support of so many of us former victims of...

Thank you Tea ah hah! Exercise! Helpful. Husband is off life support but long way to go.

It will be a roller coaster ride for awhile. Don’t be hard on yourself. You are doing what is normal in your situation…floundering back and forth. Do you have the what ifs? I did and it was terrible. There is grieving we go through. Be kind to yourself.

Teasel: Will you think of me. My husband was in the ER for a sore throat. He has myasthenia Gravis. All the muscles in his body break down. The infection made it impossible to swallow, even water, and he could not talk. His lungs failed and he is on life support at U of A. I am doing well but...

This is a huge positive step. Keep up the great work and stay safe. You are worth it.

Just want to add one thing I read about and I believe for me is true. Trauma affects the brain neurologically. I was diagnosed with fibro. I hurt everywhere. The first thing he said was,” “Have you gone through any trauma in your life”? I said yes. He said 100% of his fibro patients respond in...

Have you read “The Body Keeps the Score” ? Might be a good read. Best to you on your journey.💕

Please become informed before recontacting to an abuser. You will be setting yourself up for some real harm which may start with the deception of flowers, candy and kind words but ultimately wind itself up to all of the stages of the cycle of abuse. Why do we go back?No good outcome unless...

Write it out in your hand in a journal to yourself. Read it several times then sleep on it. I have found impulsivity…mine not yours.. has landed me in deep water. Sometimes waiting, though hard is hard in itself. Proud of you. Harsh one won’t get it and it keeps you teathered to them. It also...

Did this help …stream of consciousness writing. Do you journal? I have found great release in writing…not on a pc or iPad, but in my own hand. I have often used a BenjaminT when I need to look at important decisions. I make a T on a piece of paper and on one side pros and the other cons and make...

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May I ask you a question for my clearer understanding? According to volumes of research trauma ,childhood or other, can affect a person neurologically. The brain is affected. Does that come to play in calling all of us with PTSD or CPSST narcissistic or does it change that equation in anyway...

True…

Not that simple. There is narcissistic abuse which can produce PTSD along with narcissism. It is quite a different matter than calling all people with PTSD narcissist. They can be but it is treated different than the disorder of narcissism. How about research and better communication skills. If...

It is normal to seek validation from other people. It seems to me you focus more on peoples approval than you do on yourself. Most of us do things at times in order to get things. Somewhere along the line I think you lost your self core.People want to know you. Overgiving physically or...

Agreed.

Congratulations to you,also. It is a turn around for sure. I hope I can remember this next time it happens. Keep up with this successful turn of events! Thanks!

Dear Dear Pablo, You have so many labels for yourself. So many identifying factors regarding your abuse. You also label,shame and hate yourself. The trauma you underwent as a child has defined you. Have you attempted to sit and contemplate the idea that you were born for a reason and that all of...