I lost my brother N in January this year. N and I went through hell together, he took the brunt of it. We lost our other brother, J four years before N died, our dad, five years before that. There's been a lot of loss and I know grief pretty well. N died of an aggressive brain tumour, after...
Not sure what I’m asking for.
I’ve been under a lot of pressure lately, work stuff mostly, but also other things. I blew up at my manager a few days ago, yelled at him, probably went too far. I’m off now for 10 days but I’m going to have to do something about that when I go back. In the...
I’m currently going through a CBTi course (cognitive behavioural therapy for insomnia), at an NHS sleep clinic. It involves a combination of sleep hygiene, sleep restriction and CBT techniques to improve/fix insomnia. Most of the techniques I already know and have been practicing for years, but...
I get fatigue pretty regularly, have done for years. It can last anything from a single day to a few weeks at a time. I’ve been fatigued for the last few weeks and am at the end of my tether with it. I’m calling the doctors on Monday.
There are reasons for me to get it. I’ve been diagnosed with...
All my life I've repressed my feelings. I'm not used to feeling much of anything, other than the occasional temper flare, which usually burns out pretty quick. But for the last few weeks I've been kind of on edge, snapping over little things for very little reason.
My T is convinced I'm...
There's currently work going on ouside my house. It started over a week ago, and as soon as they started digging ditches I knew I was at risk of being triggered into an insomnia attack. When I stop sleeping, I stop altogether.
The ditches stretch about 15 metres in either direction of my...
I can't do eye contact. Even with my closest friends I avoid looking at their faces except for the briefest glance. I know why I can't, and that it has a big chunk to do with childhood neglect, and a whole lot to do with toxic shame from my hugely dysfunctional family, and I'm working on...
This is going to take some explaining, so you might have to bear with-
Almost three months ago my brother died. He had a dog, an ageing Staffie, that, my family were informed, had been rehomed with a loving family. This was a weight off our minds, with everything else going on.
My brother, J...
I am struggling to understand what self-compassion is, without turning it into a bad thing.
So, last night I had a recollection of something that was pretty much my day to day life as a child. Several hours after that I realised that the momemnt of recollection was was the one at which my...
Tonight I volunteered at a community event. Just a year ago I was unable to even go out for a night with work colleagues, with social anxiety pretty much crippling me, not to mention trust issues and no sense of self-worth.
Tonight's event involved me turning up alone to a meeting of strangers...
This has been going round in my head for days and I'm getting nowhere.
I have an interview next week for my manager's job position. I'm currently a supervisor. I thought I had a pretty good chance- from a technical viewpoint I have masses more experience than any of the other applicants...
My therapist has set me a challenge. Next week I am to tell her one achievable thing that's on my wish list. I am really struggling with this so I thought to reach out and see if anybody here has a wish list and what sorts of things are on it. Also any advice to help me would be hugely...
So tomorrow is the day I've got a 100 mile drive for a work training session. It's probably twice as far again as I've ever driven in my eight years of driving, and on a motorway, which I've never driven on before.
It seems a stupid thing to get anxious about. I've done the journey as a...
The first time I remeber doing this I was 9 and on a trip to my baby cousin's christening. I kind of became obsessed with the number 3 and started counting everything in threes. I remember being shouted at by my mum because I couldn't keep up with her when we were out walking and I was counting...
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-31483186
My therapist mentioned seeing this, so I looked it up. I just wanted to jump up and down and shout yes! Someone's saying it out loud...:joyful:
http://goodmenproject.com/ethics-values/the-unspoken-secrets-about-life-after-abuse-fiff/
I thought after the threads that have been posted here recently people might find it interesting. Not that it tells you how to go about achieving those results.
So I've been in a pretty strange place all day. I think this has been creeping up on me all week.
Earlier this week I posted something about a song from Matilda the Musical in here. I mentioned it on another thread and it reminded me of how I felt when I saw the show. I didn't know what it was...
i have a major problem with relaxing. I've recently realised just how tense I am, and how it's affecting my health. I have problems with my back, shoulders and arms, not to mention digestive issues and so on. I've been seeing a chiropracter for a while now. The problem is while I might be fine...
Reading things on this site are making me recognise things from my past. The incidents I'm going to describe happened a few years ago now.
I used to work on a checkout in a supermarket. I saw plenty of different kinds of customers, from nice friendly ones to right idiots. But not much bothered...
Unpleasant imagery:
It's not a memory. We were discussing my reactions to my brother's attempted suicide when I was 5. I told her it was around then I began to prepare myself for the possibility of him dying. Not just him, but my mum too. I was not much older than that when I overheard a friend...
It took three days of training in the freezing cold, aching muscles, a fair amount of anxiety and one killer headache but I'm now officially qualified to drive a bendi-truck at work. So glad I stuck with it. Not only will it make my job easier, but it's an unusual skill I can take elsewhere...
This has probably been asked before but I'd be interested to know how those of you struggle with 'feeling' things connect to your emotions.
I'm having real trouble connecting to my feelings. Even on a day to day basis it takes real effort to figure out if I'm feeling good or bad or angry or...
Hello,
I've just found this forum through Pete Walker's book on complex PTSD. I'm still coming to terms with the fact that I'm still suffering from PTSD due to my hugely disfunctional childhood. I naively thought I'd managed to put it behind me.
My mother was an alcoholic. She was violent...