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    Anti-depressant with least emotional blunting?

    I have symptoms of so many conditions that I have no idea where to start. My p-docs will give me anything. I basically tell them what I want, which is good and bad. Right now I'm trying ADHD drugs, but I may try to focus on my depression. For members here, which anti-depressants worked and...
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    Anxiety as rushing...

    I have delusional-disorder, but even when it's in remission, I still have to rush everywhere and am filled with nervous energy. And if I have something to do the next day, I keep thinking about it and can't sleep. I'll admit that sometimes my anxiety is delusion-based, like having the idea...
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    Starting Concerta (generic)

    TL/DR way down at bottom... So I have symptoms of delusional disorder, PTSD, OCD, GAD, depression, and BPD. Nothing seems to work, but I admit I get impatient staying with meds longer than a month, and I quit them a lot sooner than that if they have bad side-effects. One thing I never gave...
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    Ever feel so messed up that just understanding yourself feels like a victory?

    I go through a cycle. 1) I become more and more distressed. 2) I get to a point where things seem like they can't get any darker. 3) I'll have some moment of clarity or a kind of "epiphany" that makes sense of everything. 4) I'll feel a sort of relief, or even a sense of accomplishment, just...
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    Sexual attraction (contains sexual content, though not explicit)

    Though heterosexual, I have never been attracted to naked women. I remember times kids would sneak their fathers' Playboy magazines and go crazy over the centerfolds. I was unmoved. I could never understand that. I knew there was sexual abuse. I have certain feelings and dreams that lead me to...
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    When the erotic thoughts take over...

    Every couple of weeks it hits me. Unfortunately I have no healthy outlet to express my desires. This makes my desires stronger, and with still no outlet, the desires become odder and more negative. There are ways I could indulge, but I'm too inhibited to even pursue them. So I'm left in this...
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    Buspirone/Buspar

    I started 5mg 3x daily just yesterday. Took 5 doses so far and not feeling any side effects, which is great. Not feeling anything good either, but from what I read that can take a minimum of two weeks, maybe much longer. Anyone have any experience with it?
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    CBD Oil Changed My Life

    This product is legal in my state, and there are no restrictions on it. It's CBD oil (1000mg full-spectrum tincture). I had tried taking it for slight anxiety, but it didn't seem to do anything. So I eventually took a megadose, and well, it went like this: Sitting in the easy chair, I started...
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    Eating...why is it so complicated?

    I have no idea when to eat nor how much to eat. I have no natural instinct when it comes to eating. I have body issues as well, and force-vomit on occasion. This eating-confusion is related to those issues, but it goes way beyond it. I just don't have any structure for eating. I can't make any...
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    The "like" option

    This is probably a symptom of my condition, but I've started obsessing about when to give "likes", when it comes to points of view. For instance, when you ask a question and someone gives an opinion you don't agree with, do most of you "like" it because the person answered it period, or would...
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    Getting nowhere

    Thirty-plus years of getting nowhere...every once in a while feeling embarrassed by my username but always returning to the realization that it fits...not even finding enough of a reason for living to find a focus for this diary. It's not worth it to go into my history. I started typing it, but...
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    Better meds out there?

    My history is long and confusing. I have been diagnosed differently by various therapists and p-docs. I have spent many years thinking - thinking about my problems and how to get better. Thinking so much that I've realized that "thinking" is a huge symptom of my illness, if not the main cause of...
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    Anxiety Because Meds Seem To Be Working Rather Than Not Working

    I know people have a lot of anxiety regarding meds, and even about meds working. Some people may be fearful that their meds are working because they don't know what to expect being "normal". Even though their outlook has changed, the unknown can be scary. I too suffer anxiety when my meds seem...
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    DID Multiple personalities but not really

    Does anyone know if there is a term for this, and does anyone have similar symptoms?: I have multiple personalities but not in the classic sense. It's not as if they have identities. It's just a whole different me depending on the situation. It usually happens automatically, but there have also...
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    News Propranolol To Stop Fear

    I know that people take propranolol for anxiety, but has anyone else read about Dr. Merel Kindt and the work she's done using propranolol to rid people of their fears? I'm posting a link below. It sounds very promising, but I have not seen any mention on how and where someone can find such...
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    What's Our Fault And What Isn't?

    Does anyone else struggle with knowing what's your fault and what isn't in your current lives? I don't mean what happened in our childhood. I know many people can't convince themselves that their childhood wasn't their fault. But I'm talking about knowing it wasn't your fault but being unable to...
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    Other Lost

    I'm a 46 year old male. I've been diagnosed as having delusional disorder, but I also fit all the symptom clusters of PTSD. I could probably even be labelled schizo-affective and even borderline. I have no idea what I'm supposed to do in general, in life. I have no direction, no purpose. I have...
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