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  1. StillPen

    Sufferer Living with PTSD & looking for services & coping mechanisms

    Welcome. This forum can be a great resource for healthy distraction and peer support until your professional help gets lined up. The social threads are especially helpful when your symptoms are spiking.
  2. StillPen

    covidic forgiveness

    No words of wisdom here. But a raise of the glass as well. You've carried a lot, lady. A calloused heart should not be one of them. I'd say count your blessings, but what kind of BS that would be when all you are really trying to say is "I'm grieving loss, and it hurts beyond words". And, you...
  3. StillPen

    The "I Need A Hug" Thread

    Hugs @SunnyWeather and @sunlight7!
  4. StillPen

    Seeking/Begging For Validation Beyond What One Expect

    What I wonder is, what were you hoping to get from the other neighbors that you didn't get from the old fart who triggered you? From the outside looking in and having only a sliver of detail, it looks to me you were looking for two things; 1). Any proof (by an exact incident) from any other...
  5. StillPen

    The "I Need A Hug" Thread

    Many hugs and wishes for a full recovery.
  6. StillPen

    DID I think I might have DID

    Steadying support while you find your path.
  7. StillPen

    DID I think I might have DID

    @SunnyWeather, no matter what label it is given, if it feels "unreal" or "sureal", but undeniable, "something" is going on, and therefore worth getting professional help to be properly diagnosed. My memory was "failing" more and more in the beginning, things you mention def describe the hard...
  8. StillPen

    One Thing That Made You Smile Today?

    Hearing my kids and their friends laughing.
  9. StillPen

    How to diffuse dissociating in bad days/ground yourself

    Those I experience are like your second, happen every day, in the morning and last through the day. Then by early afternoon, I restabilize and my head 'clears up'. So, what I do to come back from the abyss every 3 seconds to 5 minutes throughout that time that allows me to actually get any work...
  10. StillPen

    The "I Need A Hug" Thread

    Sending hugs @Teasel. How ever many you need.
  11. StillPen

    Bad flashback

    I am so in awe of the amazing self-care, acknowledging where you are, what happened and coping...coping! A set back, not the end...just amazing! Hope everything settles soon...
  12. StillPen

    The "I Need A Hug" Thread

    Rough, rough shower today. Could use 1000 hugs.
  13. StillPen

    Just Joking

    OMG, I laughed out loud...I have told my T so, so many times I was conditioned growing up...I'm just like Pavlov's dog. I really need this laugh!
  14. StillPen

    Had a bad day today - Does anyone else have a hard time controlling their anger?

    Not much advice, as I turn my anger inward 99% of the time, but I do read about explosive anger being a classic symptom of PTSD here on the forum. So, know you are not alone. I wish you luck in finding positive coping skills to help you manage it.
  15. StillPen

    Bad flashback

    With tou @SeekingAfrica. Pajamas and junk food are just fine...you're eating and have clothes on...two good things. Hopefully you are sleeping well. I'm sorry this was a bad one.
  16. StillPen

    My back hurts when getting out of hyperarousal, is this normal?

    This is excellent info. Bookmarking for a reminder.
  17. StillPen

    Watching over others Day & Night -The Challenge Of Suicidal Watch

    Having been in a psych ward, and having to help put a loved one in a psych ward, yep, I get it...100% agree. I had to conciously cross the line into 'this will now be on my record' and do it anyway, knowing it could be used against me down the road, but also knowing in that moment, I was a...
  18. StillPen

    Sufferer I’m having a lot of struggles with my relationships & self loathing.

    Welcome! I have found so much support, caring and love here. I hope you find the same. I posted accross several threads for a bit, then I started a members diary to start proceeding my traumas, which serves for me as exposure therapy. I keep up with and post in several other's diaries as well...
  19. StillPen

    You know that you're still functioning when...

    Your keys are on the hook next to the door and your milk is in the fridge, not the other way around. All your groceries made it into the house and put away, and your car door is actually shut. You did rinse the conditioner out of your hair...and kind of remember doing it... Deodorant made it...
  20. StillPen

    Sufferer Anxiety, Depression, & Having A Hard Time With Christmas Being Lonely

    Hanging on with both hands, too. You are def. not alone here. Welcome!
  21. StillPen

    Gift from therapist

    I use rocks, much the same as Arfie. All different textures. They are all over my house. Good luck in finding a suitable replacement. I know your heart must hurt being that it was a special gift.
  22. StillPen

    This is the kind of day…

    This is true, every day...I agree with @prynne.
  23. StillPen

    Relationship Help Please I’m eroding away from partner’s PTSD

    Yup, she is very unhealthy be it PTSD or not....calling you when she is up for it and tossing you to the curb when she's run out of the emotional steem necessary to handle a two-way relationship. She maybe be a lovely person but needs lots and lots of help, from a professional...not you. Don't...
  24. StillPen

    Mixed feelings about possible rehire

    Definitely no criticism here, you know yourself best and if I had someone reminding me of my abuser, that would not be exposure therapy I could tolerate, it would be re-traumatizing...so weigh the Pros and Cons with that in mind. For me, routine is key as well. Same shift may work. Maybe...
  25. StillPen

    You Know You Have PTSD When...

    The hardest thing you do is put on your socks and it so mentally exhausting you have to go back to bed and take a nap!
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