12birds
Confident
I walked off the job last weekend after having some sort of flashback or dissociative episode. I don't know what exactly happened or why, but I was on edge and ready to have a meltdown. Then I grabbed my purse and clocked out. I don't remember my thought process at the time, but I DO remember the overwhelming need to flee. Tried to get into the wrong car in the parking lot.
I'm horrified I've done this. It's not like me and I'm afraid it's indicating something worse going on. What's done is done and I can't get my job back - management was not aware of my diagnosis, and in any case, walking out in the middle of a shift is unacceptable.
I still feel like I'm moving through fog days later.
Today I slept until 1, but forced myself to go to class. Came back and sat in the dark for while.
I've been having really awful dreams lately. Lots of suicide dreams, dead animals, etc.
One strange part: I was sitting in my high school math class having a panic attack. In the dream someone brought a therapy dog - a golden retriever. Snuggling the dog in the dream made the panic stop and I woke up.
I'm horrified I've done this. It's not like me and I'm afraid it's indicating something worse going on. What's done is done and I can't get my job back - management was not aware of my diagnosis, and in any case, walking out in the middle of a shift is unacceptable.
I still feel like I'm moving through fog days later.
Today I slept until 1, but forced myself to go to class. Came back and sat in the dark for while.
I've been having really awful dreams lately. Lots of suicide dreams, dead animals, etc.
One strange part: I was sitting in my high school math class having a panic attack. In the dream someone brought a therapy dog - a golden retriever. Snuggling the dog in the dream made the panic stop and I woke up.