Hi folks,
I enlisted in the marine corps and served four years without any combat experience. I was 21 years old when I was honorably discharged. When I went into the corp I was clean and sober and returned to civilian life a drunk. I boozed it up for about twenty five years until my mind and body could take no more. Trying to get sober put me in a psychiatry hospital and upon discharge was treated for more than ten years for depression and anxiety. I was on every medication for both and not one drug helped and actually pushed me into a suicide mode. During one of my therapy sessions I was told I have PTSD. I dismissed this because I was never in combat. I was told that it combat is not the only thing that causes PTSD. With the exception of a some very rough treatment in boot camp I could not think of any incident that may have caused my PTSD and was told that I most likely have suppressed memories.
Upon retirement from work I was given a bottle of Clonazepam and sent on my way.
Ten years later I learned that I was addicted to benzos and met with another psychiatrist at my latest location and was once again diagnosed with PTSD. The doctor told me I was a classic case for PTSD by using booze as a drug and upon sobering up was using psychotropic medications to treat my PTSD. This time I believed him.
At my next VA annual physical I told this to the examining GP and I was sent to a VA psychiatrist. This psychiatrist told me that it would be impossible to have PTSD if I were never in combat.
I was drunk for twenty five years, on SSRI's, benzos, and even off-label psychotropic for another ten years, and finally put on Clonazepam and sent on my way. After I realized I was addicted to the Clonazepam it took me over three years to get clean. Now I have symptoms typical of PTSD that are not near as severe as they were in the past but are still present. I went to the VA and given disability papers to submit. The problem is I still can't remember an incident bad enough to cause PTSD unless, as it was suggest, it is a suppressed memory.
I am looking for any ideas as I am on Medicare and Medicare will provide meds but no therapy. Without the therapy I don't see how I will ever remember what happed to me.
Comments appreciated, thanks.
I enlisted in the marine corps and served four years without any combat experience. I was 21 years old when I was honorably discharged. When I went into the corp I was clean and sober and returned to civilian life a drunk. I boozed it up for about twenty five years until my mind and body could take no more. Trying to get sober put me in a psychiatry hospital and upon discharge was treated for more than ten years for depression and anxiety. I was on every medication for both and not one drug helped and actually pushed me into a suicide mode. During one of my therapy sessions I was told I have PTSD. I dismissed this because I was never in combat. I was told that it combat is not the only thing that causes PTSD. With the exception of a some very rough treatment in boot camp I could not think of any incident that may have caused my PTSD and was told that I most likely have suppressed memories.
Upon retirement from work I was given a bottle of Clonazepam and sent on my way.
Ten years later I learned that I was addicted to benzos and met with another psychiatrist at my latest location and was once again diagnosed with PTSD. The doctor told me I was a classic case for PTSD by using booze as a drug and upon sobering up was using psychotropic medications to treat my PTSD. This time I believed him.
At my next VA annual physical I told this to the examining GP and I was sent to a VA psychiatrist. This psychiatrist told me that it would be impossible to have PTSD if I were never in combat.
I was drunk for twenty five years, on SSRI's, benzos, and even off-label psychotropic for another ten years, and finally put on Clonazepam and sent on my way. After I realized I was addicted to the Clonazepam it took me over three years to get clean. Now I have symptoms typical of PTSD that are not near as severe as they were in the past but are still present. I went to the VA and given disability papers to submit. The problem is I still can't remember an incident bad enough to cause PTSD unless, as it was suggest, it is a suppressed memory.
I am looking for any ideas as I am on Medicare and Medicare will provide meds but no therapy. Without the therapy I don't see how I will ever remember what happed to me.
Comments appreciated, thanks.