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Message: <blockquote data-quote="Ronin" data-source="post: 1691763" data-attributes="member: 5084">Ah makes sense :tup:I would start somewhere else -Goal would still be sharing tabs and cooperation, on trauma and outside of it, and integration of at least the trauma and its effects, if of the people ain't your gig -But even sharing and co-consciousness isn't always feasible or practical.So assuming you can't -Try working with what you *have* and can access, and how it makes *you* feel about your-all life.Find comfort zone about pieces you don't know about, and throw you off, functionality wise, less... or to not have it derail *you* at all, even if mentally you take note something is off / missing / out of place / too polished up and looking clean where you suspect it's not and such.And, firsts off?Limit contact with that individual, in a safe to (all of you and most of all physical) fashion.It's darned hard to work on co-consciousness if there's an active abuse / trauma bonding of some persons still on.Extricate first.Stabilize second.Get outside help, therapeutic and any other security, with the moving away from that abuser.And respect & valuing & praise of the other personality helps, or might help, too. Definitely don't blame her. Making radically different choices about your life she may be, she is and was still trying her best to survive a situation in which she was thrown into - with the need to hide the pain even from you and the rest of you if applicable.She is a victim in this.You are a victim in this.With different issues...But both / all victims.And the description and confusion totally makes sense, both as a description and experience-relate. :tup:It's not your fault you had no idea, or a very little of it, or just pieces, either. D.I.D. is simply pretty brilliant disorder for awful as f*ck trauma. That you are coping at all, and are all alive, is a major win... not a sign of losing it. ;)</blockquote>

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