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Emerg Services Annoying And Weird

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Stacieamy

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Does anyone ever get in a contradictory state? Like, you want food, but nothing is good. You're thirsty, but you don't want to drink anything. You want to do something useful, but you also want to sleep all day. You want to see friends, but you want to run everyone off. This seems to happen to me regularly and I hate it! It's a terrible feeling, but I dunno how to make it stop.
 
Welcome to my world...I feel like that all the effing time! Usually I just push through it, know what needs to be done and do the right thing not because I feel like it, but because its the right thing to do. That's what keeps me hydrated, properly fed, and generally clean. As far as socialization goes, if I'm really in a pissy mood, I don't hang out with my friends. I wait until I can pull myself together and actually make an ATTEMPT at being a decent human being. Thankfully, my friends know about my various and sundry issues, and are ok with me as I am, weirdness and all. Hang in there, this is just part of the ride...
 
OMG Yes....I have really been dealing with this a lot lately. Hate that battle....yes I should eat...no don't want anything....need to do x, nope do not want to....You are not alone....Do not have the magic answer...just know that you do not battle alone.
 
Lol.....that's exactly most days for me. It leads to massive indecision sometimes, I can't even pick one thing to attempt I'm so flatlined. My diet is ultra simplistic.....just don't care to make anything.
 
Yes. I detest grocery shopping because I have to make decisions.

Too many choices is why -even when I'm doing well- my basic wardrobe* are repeats. A dozen black camis. Half a dozen long sleeve black shirts. 4 pairs of the same grey pants. 2 pairs of jeans. All the same socks. Black and grey and jeans meant any top and any bottom. No thinking. In the dark. Grab and go.

Same with dishes, all white, all the same brand, same style.

Et cetera.

The more I remove thinking from the equation of the mundane meaningless tasks? The more functional I am. I reserved thinking for the fun stuff. Not the stuff that would just leave me staring at a wash of... f*ck. f*ck f*ck f*ck. I give up.


* This is not to say I didnt own Chinese silks and velvet coats and Japanese kimonos and what not. I did. I just kept them in my wardrobe. So when I felt like getting fun with my clothes I could. The rest of the time? Grab a PT roll for the gym, grab the snowboarding box for the snow, grab a top & bottom for the day. No thinking. Voila. Thank god.
 
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