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Anyone have any luck with these symptoms and any meds? I cannot find any meds that work!

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Matthew S

I Have had PTSD since my separation date over 20 years ago as well as being diagnosed with Depression and mild Bi-Polar basically just having a hypomania episode 1-3 times a year thats like drinking too much coffee. I was treated by a Dr while still Enlisted and they WAY OVER MEDICATED ME! I had so much medication making me sedated I was a zombie! I guess they wanted to just stop the issue and if I can’t tell what day it is I couldn’t complain! I was able to manage the PTSD with a regimen of 4mg Klonopin and some 25mg of seroquil /day. So I am now older and had to serve 18 months in Federal Prison because of my company making explosives and weapons platforms like for vehicles and ships, airplanes.

I am not having panic in the early day for the most part. It will be bothering me in the AM every so often. But, I find that the panic can come on from 1pm -5pm and it’s unbearable! I almost am suicidal over it!

I have been sick and not able to work for 2-1/2 years and this is making me Koo Koo! But it will come on when I try to get to sleep or if I try to nap because after loosing 100 lbs in a few months because of an undiagnosed illness I am exhausted a lot. I have that making me worse with my PTSD and panic now from being isolated and so frustrated! I have tried everything from SSRI’s ,(I am super sensitive to SSRI’s and cannot take them which a lot of medication that is SSRI would be perfect to treat for what is going on with me. So they are out. I ended up with the Dr and Myself getting to the point where we decided to get me on just the Klonopin 4-5 1mg 4x a day, the Seroquil 12.5mg at lunch and going up to 25mg at lunch and then it will be another 25mg at bedtime and then I take valproic acid or “Depakote” which I have to taper off of because it’s making my liver enzyme’s be too elevated. So I will have to probably take something to help with my depression.

I really am just looking for a place where I can get some support and I can feel comfortable talking to ppl who understand and have served as that is a big deal to me!

So I am having non stop, daily panic attacks that are paralyzing and I literally want to rip my skin off and run! Or just step off a cliff! I won’t because my Father committed suicide and it hurt too much to leave my wife and family so hurt!

Any ideas on medication or any other practice of meditation or something is welcome! I never have ever meditated but I am being tortured so painfully,(Both mentally and my ongoing physical pain from trying to find out why I lost 100 lbs?), that I am open to it or anything that will help me! Anything!

I appreciate any help and sry for the length of this novel but I wanted to make my intro to be full and have some background.
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Psilocybin, dextromethorphan, gabapentin, propranolol, zopiclone/zolpidem, kratom and Wellbutrin have all been varying levels of effective for me. If you're curious about some of these (as a self-directed treatment you need to have a good solid research framework so that you're conducting it safely) let me know. The safest one on the list is gabapentin.
I've tried so many medications for PTSD. I haven't taken many since 2019 because nothing works. Hydroxyzine has been my only crutch, besides nicotine, caffeine and cannabis. I stopped the anti-histamine because it stopped working. I had my genetics analyzed recently and saw a clinical pharmacist who recommended Vraylar. It is not approved by the FDA for PTSD, yet. It was originally prescribed for Schizophrenia and then Bipolar 1. My serotonin receptors are lazy, so SSRIs/SNRIs do not work. The metabolites also cause rare and severe side effects. Vraylar has very few known side effects, but the ones that have been reported are usually only seen in the elderly and pertain to muscle movement. So far so good. I started on 9/16 and have only experienced mild dizziness. I feel euphoric about an hour after taking 1.5mg. By 2-3 hours, I get a burst of energy, become focused and highly motivated. I cleaned and reorganized my house all weekend. I mowed the yard, too! I usually lay in the bed a lot on the weekends from exhaustion.

This drug is fast acting due to the chemical mechanisms. I'm still having some anxiety, but not nearly like I was. Fits of anger seem under control. I'm also not ruminating about the past so much. My sleep has not really improved, but that is nothing new. I haven't slept well in months because of nightmares. I am hopeful the good doctor has chosen the correct drug for me. I have honestly never felt this good so quickly with medication before. The retail price for brand is outrageous, so without insurance it's expensive. I will keep posting updates. If side effects do occur, they will appear around 3-4 weeks after the metabolites have built up in the blood. Hoping for the best and that you also find some relief from this crippling condition.
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